by Katie Dietz | Apr 23, 2024 | Featured, Life Advice |
We pulled into the drive of our new home and I have to be honest in saying that it was a bit shocking. It’s cute but much smaller than the house we moved out of. The yard hasn’t been treated and weeds have overtaken any sign of the potential green grass hiding underneath. The kitchen was far from complete and as I walked around this 1930’s cottage style home, I could feel the anxiety rising within. There was no sink, dishwasher or countertops on the cabinets. I know I sound like a drama queen but as I took a walk through the house, I looked over at my husband and said, “what did we do?” He kindly responded, “It’ll be okay, babe. Just keep the bigger picture in mind” Through the tears and temporary frustration, I knew he was right.
When my husband accepted his new job and we decided to move, we were both feeling a deep stirring in our hearts to simplify our lives. When I say simplify I mean, finding a smaller house, getting rid of all car payments, less eating out and less commitments all together. At the beginning of this move I thought the desire came from our dream of buying some land and building a house again one day. We knew if we wanted this dream to become a reality sooner rather than later we needed to take a step back for a season to save. What I’ve realized a few months into this move is the desire to simplify our lives wasn’t just to prepare ourselves for our dream but for spiritual growth too. As we simplify our lives, it reveals what truly matters most in our hearts.
I don’t know about you but I’ve heard the phrase “less is more” many times throughout my life. However, I can’t say I’ve really ever applied it to my life or understood the impact it can have if we follow the philosophy. Throughout my younger twenties I believed creating a successful and fulfilling life meant I needed to have things to show for it like having a bigger house, nicer car and more money. The problem with that mindset is as trends faded, discontentment would eventually arise within my heart. This was a pattern I began to notice within myself from year to year.
What I’ve discovered is there is a difference between making a mistake versus a reoccurring pattern in our lives. Mistakes need grace and mercy. Patterns need healing. Patterns reveal there is something beneath the surface that we need to bring to Jesus. What I’ve grown to love about God is that when he exposes something, like a negative pattern, it’s not to make us feel bad or shameful about ourselves. Rather it’s to reveal our need for Him and to draw our hearts closer to His. God wants to heal what he reveals and sanctify our hearts in the process. Every day and season is a chance to be developed. Sometimes he wants to develop our character and other times He wants to heal the deep wounds and misconceptions within. For me, I learned my need to have the next best thing was rooted in feeling like I needed to prove myself. Can you relate?
The question I’ve been prompted to ask myself in this season is: “ Am I truly satisfied with Jesus alone or am I only satisfied when I have Jesus plus something else?” Make no mistake– I love having nice things too! I enjoy my hair extensions, getting my nails done and dreaming of the house and land we will one day raise a family on! We love traveling and trying out the newest restaurant in our area too. None of these things are bad. In fact, they are all part of what makes life fun! Yet, I’ve discovered that in the midst of pursuing all these things, we can still be checking the purity of our motives by coming before Jesus and asking him to search our hearts. Have we caught ourselves in a round of keeping up with the joneses? Are we pursuing these things to prove our worth to a world that will never meet our deepest need to be seen? Are we trying to one up that family member or friend who upset us by getting something we know they can’t have? Are we trying to find value in things that will one day disappear forever?
Matthew 6:19-21 says, “Don’t store up treasures here on Earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.”
Friend, I don’t know where you have found yourself today. Maybe you’re overwhelmed with keeping up with all the latest trends and your bank account is hurting because of it. Maybe you’ve over committed yourself to others that you can’t remember the last time you sat down and ate dinner with your family. Perhaps you feel spiritually dry and want to experience God’s presence in your life again. I see you. I was there just a few months ago.
What if the key to a more meaningful life is a simpler life? What if decluttering our lives is what leads us into a deeper relationship with Jesus and the people in our lives? Perhaps it’s in the season’s where we let go of the stuff we think we need most that we will discover the life God has in store is actually so much better than we could ask or think. Maybe it’s in the process of letting all striving cease that we will realize that we all have access to a simple life worth living. One that is full of joy, gratitude and contentment. A life that is deeply rooted in Jesus satisfying our every need to be known, loved and seen. We might even discover a deeper peace within our hearts that God has us right where He wants us and has provided us with all that we could ever need.
Katie Dietz is a born and raised Oklahoma girl who has a heart for sharing the light & hope of Jesus. She recently moved to NW Oklahoma with her husband Kory where they enjoy evening walks after work and finding new places to explore near OKC! She is a part time dental hygienist and is currently writing her first book with Our Daily Bread. She is the founder of Back Porch Devotionals- a community focused on encouraging women on their walk with Jesus through daily devotionals & faith- filled truth. Her 1st book is set to come out in 2026! In the meantime you can keep up with her on Instagram @katie.dietz & @back.porch.devos
by Alley and Amanda | Apr 18, 2024 | Featured, Life Advice |
To: The sister who wants to say YES, but fear is whispering in her ear.
“Start a Bible study in your home…Oh, I’m not sure my house is big enough.”
“Serve at the local food bank…It costs too much to get a baby sitter for my kids.”
“Join a women’s group at your church…I feel bad for leaving my husband with the kids after work.”
“Apply for the job…My resume isn’t very good.”
“Give the waitress a large tip…I can’t because I need to save money.”
Oh how guilty I am for getting an idea, a nudge from the Holy Spirt, or an invitation to say YES to God, but shut it down quickly. But why? Fear. The fear of thinking I heard wrong. The fear of not being good enough. The fear that I won’t be able to handle it or mange the details, and the fear that I will lose control or be labeled as a failure for starting something and not finishing.
Fear. Fear. Fear. We all have it.
Do you know what else we have? Desire. Desire to do things that make us come alive. The desire to seek, hear, and walk in relationship with our Creator. The desire to say “YES” to God. Saying YES to Him doesn’t mean we won’t have fear, but saying YES draws us into a relationship with Him. An invitation into an adventure we just cannot pass up.
We find in Joshua Chapter 1 a beautiful example of yielding to God’s plan, expecting His faithfulness, and seeking Him while stepping out. God commands Joshua to seek Him so he can make wise decisions, be strong, be courageous, and trust that God is with him as he goes. We see in this passage that God is the great planner, faithful in His promises, and trustworthy. So, of course we can give Him our YES, but how?
Think of your “YES” in three categories: Yield to Gods Plan, Expect His Faithfulness, & Seek Him and Step Out.
Y: YIELD TO GODS PLAN (Joshua 1:2)
God called Joshua to “ARISE” or get up and go. God had a plan to bring His people into the land He promised and needed Joshua to yield to that plan. I think it’s important to note the word “yield.” When you come to a yield sign, you slow your vehicle and look around for other traffic that could come from another direction. To give our YES to God, we must yield to His pace. It can be tempting to rush ahead and take matters into our own hands, or kick our feet questioning if we really should step into this opportunity. So, where do we start? We ask. Jeremiah 33:3 says, “Call on the Lord and He will answer you, and tell you hidden things that you do not know.” Prayer is not just a monologue, but a dialogue. We must come to Him with courage to ask, “God, what are you inviting me into?” He promises to answer.
E: EXPECT HIM TO BE FAITHFUL (Joshua 1:5)
He said to Joshua, “No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life. Just as I was with Moses, so I will be with you. I will not leave you or forsake you.” I love how God promises and reminds. He promises Joshua that his journey will be successful, that He will go with him, and He will not leave him. He reminds Joshua of His faithfulness with Moses. Joshua had walked with Moses and learned the ways of leadership and had seen God’s faithfulness to him which encouraged him to step into his new role. Just as God promised and reminded Joshua, He does the same with us and we can expect it.
S: SEEK HIM AND STEP OUT (Joshua 1:3)
The vow to receive the land was part of God’s covenant with Israel. God would keep this vow, but the Israelites had a working part in receiving the land. He told Joshua, “I will give you every place where you set your foot, as I promised Moses.” This means Joshua and the Israelites must “set foot” in the land and war for their inheritance. As was noted by Moses when passing on the Word of the Lord, “See, I have given you this land. Go in and take possession of the land the Lord swore he would give to your fathers — to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob — and to their descendants after them”. The Lord had given Israel the land, but they would have an active part in taking possession of the land themselves. God worked on their accounts as they STEPPED OUT in FAITH to take an ACTIVE part in taking possession (Deuteronomy 1:8).
We gave God our YES 9 years ago. We hope our story encourages you!
On Oct 2014, Amanda felt God put the word podcast on her heart. This vision was to encourage women in their faith, as wives, moms, sisters, daughters, and friends. Her response was, “Me? really? I do not know how or what to do to start that.” She didn’t share this with anyone. She kept praying about it every time God brought it to her mind and heart. Amanda and Alley soon met and their friendship grew quickly. They learned they had a huge passion to encourage women in their faith. One day in April, Amanda woke up with the podcast and Alley on her mind. She couldn’t stop thinking about it. She asked God “Is Alley suppose to do this with me?” She immediately shared her vision with Alley. Meanwhile, they were helping prepare for a women’s gathering. At the end of that women’s conference, they were all challenged to write on a stone a “step of faith” God was calling them to take. Alley and Amanda were talking after the conference and shared that they had both written “podcast” on their stones. They did not want to write it down at the time, but knew God was calling them to take that step of faith. The scripture Joshua 1:3 “I will give you a place for every step you set your foot, just as I did Moses” became so alive in God guiding their steps. They said “Yes, we do not know what to do, but we say yes to you Lord!” The next day, God gave Alley the name ”Living Out Loud.” They knew God had given them the two words “Transparency & Encouragement.” That week, God opened more doors confirming that this was His will and gave them a platform through a local well-known website. God began to reveal that this podcast was to be a platform for women to be able to share their stories. God saw two women who had a passion for Him and passion to encourage others. God heard their prayers and so sweetly brought them together to glorify Him.
Our ministry verse is Revelation 12:11 “For they will conquer by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.” We desire to encourage others to share their story and truly believe it brings healing to their hearts as well as the hearts of those who listen. Our podcast is a platform for women and men to share what God is doing in their lives and how He is faithful. Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we cry, but in the end, it’s always encouraging.
What is God inviting you into and will you say YES?
XOXO,
Your sisters Alley Bell & Amanda Reed
Have a story to share? Is God calling you to share? Visit our website and submit the form under the “Share your story” tab.
Connect with us on Facebook and Instagram or visit our website www.livingoutloud.today
Also, we just published our first devotional. Join us for 30 days as we share truths from God’s Word, personal stories from our lives, and encourage you to reflect and journal as you spend time with the Lord. Click here to purchase!
by Lysa TerKeurst | Apr 16, 2024 | Featured, Life Advice, Wisdom |
“The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:16b (NIV)
I have to admit I’m sometimes scared to pray boldly.
It’s not at all that I don’t believe God can do anything. I absolutely do. I’m a “wild about Jesus” kind of girl. Wild in my willingness. Wild in my obedience. Wild in my adventures with God.
So, my hesitation isn’t rooted in any kind of doubt about God.
It’s more rooted in a doubt about myself and my ability to absolutely discern the will of God. The reality is sometimes God chooses not to do things. And if His will is no, while I am boldly praying for a yes, it makes me feel out of step with God.
Can you relate?
I so desperately want to stay in the will of God that I find myself praying with clauses sometimes. Like, “God please heal my friend but if it’s Your will to take her, I will trust You.” I wonder why I don’t just boldly pray, “God, please heal my friend.” And then stand confidently that my prayers were not in vain no matter what the outcome.
The reality is, praying boldly boots me out of a stale place of religious habit into authentic connection with God Himself.
Prayer opens my spiritual eyes to see things I can’t see on my own. And I am convinced prayer matters. Prayers are “powerful and effective” if prayed from the position of a righteous heart, like James 5:16 says.
So, prayer does make a difference – a life-changing, mind-blowing, earth-rattling difference. We don’t need to know how. We don’t need to know when. We just need to kneel confidently and know that our simple, short prayers extend far wide and far high and far deep.
In case you’ve been wrestling through some unanswered prayers recently, lean in here: Keep pressing into God. Keep praying. Don’t pull away. He isn’t ignoring you; He is listening. He loves you too much to answer your prayers at any other time than the right time and in any other way than the right way.
Letting that truth slosh over into my soul, snuffs out the flickers of hesitation. It bends my stiff knees. And it ignites a fresh, bold wildfire within me. Not bold as in bossy and demanding. But bold as in I love Jesus with all my heart, so I want to show up and try again. Pray again. Ask again.
Look at these words from Jesus:
“But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your father knows what you need before you ask him,” (Matthew 6:6-8, NIV).
Friend, what do you need to pray boldly about today? Don’t listen to fear – go ahead and ask. And ask again. Not so that we can cause God to move, rather so that we can position our souls to be able to see Jesus move in any which way He pleases.
Dear Lord, I believe that You are the giver of life and Lord over all things. Thank You for providing me with exactly what I need, even though it isn’t always what I may want. I trust that You have my best interest in mind today. I need You Lord. Show me Your way. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
If we’re honest, when we’re already in a difficult season, connecting with God through praying and reading our Bibles can feel overwhelming. Lysa TerKeurst understands this struggle and has teamed up with other authors at Proverbs 31 Ministries to bring you a new devotional, Clear Mind, Peaceful Heart: 50 Devotions for Sleeping Well in a World Full of Worry. Written by busy women for busy women, this devotional is filled with 50 encouraging devotions, scripture verses and guided prayers, making it easier than ever for you to simply show up and spend time with God at the end of your day. Order your copy today!
by Rachel Awtrey | Apr 11, 2024 | Featured, Life Advice, Wisdom
“Detergent and creamer. Detergent and creamer.” I reminded myself. Not that this was something I was trying to remember and recall – it was actually something I was trying to remember and not venture off from. You probably know this well: go into a store for one thing, leave with several additional items. Yeah, me too. You don’t know you may need it until you see it sometimes. Not every time but the treat of picking up a bouquet of flowers for your table, the treat to surprise a child and “she just had a baby so I’m sure a ‘pick-me-up’ from the bakery would be a sweet gesture”. Then, there’s the gum at checkout, the yogurt that was on sale that you know someone will eat and the peanut butter you remembered you were actually out of and should have been on the list in the first place. Before you realize it, your arms are full and now you’re regretting you didn’t grab a grocery cart when you first walked through the doors.
You cheer yourself on by saying “let me re-situate the groceries” and “ten more steps and then I’m at checkout” and “oh gosh, my fingers is going numb from holding the bag of grapes on my pinky” while tossing up a prayer that you don’t drop something.
How did detergent and creamer turn into this? Do I need it all?
I really wish I could say grabbing more than I originally needed and trying to make it without dropping anything doesn’t happen that often but I confess it does.
I’ll go even a little further and say that this goes beyond my grocery store experiences.
It happens in the way I manage my time. “I can make that happen this afternoon and pull it off.”
It happens with the way I view life. “If I can just make it through this season, I’ll be okay.”
It happens with the way I take on responsibilities, volunteering for positions, adding more to my plate than I know is possible.
Before I know it, my arms are full (and not in the best way). There are some things I need to be carrying that I know I came for – like the detergent and creamer. But, let’s be candid – there’s a lot I’m carrying that wasn’t on the list. Some of which I can, and need, to put down. And others, I don’t have the option other than to carry.
And that’s life. Carrying around things, picking up, dropping off, switching posture to make things more comfortable, grabbing what we think might be fun, trying to swap for something better every once in a while. Isn’t it?
To put it plainly, we’re all carrying things in our arms. For some of us it’s a job, a family, a dream, grief, difficulties, celebrations, expectations, fill in the blank. Some are light, some heavy, some clunky.
You know what these are for you best and I pray you take a moment to name them. As they come up in your mind, hold them for a moment. Imagine them being in your arms, sharp edges uncomfortably resting on your forearms, fingers bending to hold the weight. It might not even look like a lot at first but the longer they’re held, the heavier they feel.
I’ve been curious, constantly intrigued because you and I have a lot in common: what we’re carrying is heavy. Now that I know this to be true and we’re on the same page about some of the truth of what we’re carrying, can I propose a solution?
Maybe the idea of “freedom” from these things doesn’t come from carrying them differently or solving the worlds biggest problems or learning how to cope and numb so we don’t feel them at all. Maybe the “freedom” comes from putting them down.
I’m not suggesting we become all of a sudden irresponsible and neglect what’s ours to hold. The heaviness of life does not come in a packaged board game box with a “get out of jail free card” when the dice you roll look different than you’d hoped. I just don’t want you to begin to think and eventually believe your only way to lighten your load is to “get out” and “jump ship.”
Through the messiness, there’s something for you here. And if you’re used to holding it all, more than you need, believing that the only way to be able to see the joy is to stop carrying it all – I have an idea for you.
What if the “freedom” we keep talking about doesn’t look like solved problems but it looks like supporting it all differently than holding it with your bare arms.
Grocery stores have grocery carts for a reason. To carry it all for us, to take it from aisle to aisle as we put stuff in and the physics of it all disperse the weight and make it all a bit more effortless.
That’s “joy.”
It’s the gifts that God gives us to see life as fun and enjoy what’s around us even though we’re pushing heavy things around.
It creates more margin to focus on the tasks at hand.
It’s the levity to survive our hardest days.
For the things you don’t have a choice to carry or not (like the child with special needs, the messy divorce, the grief from the one you lost, the heartache you’re left with when harsh words were said, when the dream isn’t on your timeline) – may I suggest you place them in the cart?
Jesus invites us to set these things down and trust his mechanics over our ‘muscling through’. “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28
So not only is it available to us, it’s an invitation.
My prayer for you is that ‘joy’ becomes so natural, so easy, a disciplined habit that it is just something you do and that you don’t know any other way to grocery shop than to push a cart and set the heavy things inside.
God is at work in our lives and would do anything to get our attention and bring us back to Him. The beautiful, show stopping moments that take your breath away, the glimpses that make you tilt your head and wonder how it worked out so perfectly that you were able to witness the beauty – let’s have the room to see it.
Rachel Awtrey is a trailblazing influencer and podcaster who defies conventional norms by inviting her audience to peek behind the curtain of her life. Rachel is a mom of two little boys, a military wife and after moving 9 times in her 8 years of marriage, she knows a thing or two about making community wherever she is!
With an unwavering commitment to transparency, Rachel shares her personal journey, triumphs, and challenges, breaking down barriers and inspiring others to embrace their own authentic selves. Through her empowering content, she provides a unique blend of encouragement and practical tips, empowering her followers to navigate life’s obstacles with resilience and grace.
In a culture that often encourages surface-level perfection, Rachel stands out by embracing vulnerability and embracing imperfections. Her refreshing approach creates a genuine connection with her audience, fostering a sense of community and reminding everyone that they are not alone in their struggles. With over 1.5 Million downloads, her chart-topping podcast, Real Talk with Rachel Awtrey (formerly Behind the Bliss Podcast) and social media platforms, Rachel is changing the game, dismantling societal expectations, and encouraging others to embrace their true selves while equipping them with valuable tools to thrive and find joy in every aspect of life.
by Ruth Simons | Apr 9, 2024 | Featured, Life Advice, Wisdom
When I was in my 20s, I almost opened a tiny art gallery and gift shop once to showcase my work in an empty loft space made available to me. It felt too daunting at the time, so I didn’t pursue it. Instead, I spent my days off from a retail job watching Oprah grant wishes and make dreams come true from a small television screen. I felt simultaneously so happy for those who were about to realize their dreams and yet so defeated, wondering if my creative pursuits would ever come out of hiding. I was twenty- four, newly married, with a fine arts degree and an unfinished seminary degree.
A few years later, I was in full-time ministry with Troy and expecting our first son, kicking off that ambitious decade-plus of bootstrapping, kickstarting, and ministry-building in the Simons household. I was honored to stand with and work alongside Troy in all our public endeavors, but I couldn’t help seeing the glaring disparity in our realities: his life was full of visible ministry while my life felt entirely hidden.
Hidden from public ministry, hidden from my potential, hidden at home with laundry and meal prep, hidden by the limitations of a season that felt like closed doors instead of big opportunities. Sure, I had giftings. And, oh, did I long to see them flourish in big ways for God’s kingdom. Missions! Leadership! The arts! Business! I was ready to pursue that tiny art gallery and wished I had when given the chance. I had big ideas for impacting the world with my passion and skills, but the opportunities God was giving me at that time were ones in obscurity, away from the limelight, grand openings, or the internet success I imagined as meaningful.
Perhaps your hiddenness stems from an unending list of tasks: perpetual meetings, clearing emails, filing taxes, driving in traffic, doing your job, and all the domestic to-dos that pile up day after day. Some of us feel hidden due to caring for elderly parents or young children who require most of our time and energy. Maybe you’ve experienced health limitations that leave you feeling benched. Or perhaps your life story just isn’t turning out the way you hoped or expected, and the hidden season you’re in feels fruitless.
But what if the hidden years—the seasons when we think our labors go unnoticed, when we feel benched by our limitations, when doors we expect to be open are shut instead, or when our giftings seem forgotten, wasted, or entirely invisible while our contributions feel small, insignificant, and simply hidden—proved more purposeful than we could ever imagine? What if we embraced the hidden years?
What if we welcomed hiddenness as much as we pursued visibility?
Visibility, multiplication, and platform aren’t the only roads that lead to impact. Embracing hiddenness may seem like a countercultural and counterintuitive path toward significance in our present age, but God has regularly used hidden years as a tool for his redemptive purposes in the lives of his people.
It’s easy to believe that, in order for God to use us, our trajectory must go from small to big, from unrecognized to widely familiar, from obscurity to fame. And if we believe that large followings, big stages, or bestselling books are required for a life of impact, we’ll spend our days trying to pull ourselves out of hiddenness and into the limelight.
This brings me back to the question: What if we embraced the hidden years because our lives are hidden in Christ? What if we welcomed hiddenness as much as we pursued visibility? What if God is raising up leaders who will influence and change the world without the biggest stages, away from the bright lights, and unaided by social media platforms, viral content, or attractive skills and talents because their lives in Christ set them apart? What if God can accomplish all that he wills without bowing to algorithms, the best hair and makeup, or a bajillion subscribers?
At this point, maybe you’re thinking, That’s a beautiful perspective, Ruth, but I get so discouraged when I’m not getting anywhere with my endeavors, when I feel like my work doesn’t matter, and when I feel like I have to play the social media game to get my message out to the world.
Friend, it may not seem like it, but I’m preaching to my very own heart here as well. It’s not lost on me that I’m sharing these thoughts in a traditionally published book that will be distributed across the globe. Or that I have influence through the social media and internet platforms I’ve created. I see that and understand the irony of talking to you about hiddenness when a part of my life is known and public.
But don’t misunderstand my point. I’m not trying to convince you that visibility is wrong or that obscurity is some- how more holy. I’m not encouraging us to forfeit God-given opportunities for an elusive “greater reach.” I’m simply suggesting that if we’re hoping for our lives to have true impact, there’s a place for both visibility and obscurity—in the big picture and sweeping seasons of our lives and in how we steward the daily rhythms of our day-to-day lives.
Here are a few questions I ask myself regularly that might help you too:
1. Am I intentionally cultivating the hidden places of my life as much as I am cultivating the public places?
2. Do I worship in secret through prayer and study of God’s Word, or am I only worshiping in public?
3. Do I invest time in soul care or care only for my physical body?
We must view hiddenness and visibility the way God does—as equally fruitful in the capable hands of a God who doesn’t need human resources or cunning moves to accomplish his work. God may choose to use obscurity on the path to raising up leaders, voices of influence, and great men and women of God, but he may just as purposefully employ the faithful and quiet work of Christ followers whose names we’ll never know this side of heaven. Since God accomplishes his will through both the visible and the invisible, we need a paradigm shift in how we see and embrace the hidden years of our lives.
Taken from Now and Not Yet by Ruth Chou Simons. Copyright © 2024 by Ruth Chou Simons. Used by permission of Thomas Nelson. www.thomasnelson.com.
Ruth Chou Simons is a Wall Street Journal bestselling and award-winning author of several books and Bible studies, including Now and Not Yet, GraceLaced, Beholding and Becoming, When Strivings Cease, and TruthFilled. She is an artist, entrepreneur, podcaster, and speaker, using each of these platforms to sow the Word of God into people’s hearts. Through social media, and her online shoppe at GraceLaced.com, Simons shares her journey of God’s grace intersecting daily life with word and art. Ruth and her husband, Troy, are grateful parents to six boys—their greatest adventure.
by Jess Connolly | Apr 5, 2024 | Featured, Life Advice, Wisdom
Some years ago, I experienced my first significant fall with fatigue.
I’d just finished the edits on my first book; my kids were eight, seven, six, and two. Our other baby, our church plant, was one year old, and like most one-year-olds—it was fussy, hands-on, and making messes as it found its feet. My online print shop had a team of three women, and the profits from our sales funded three church plants: ours in Charleston, South Carolina, one in Pakistan, and one in Amsterdam.
In that season, I hadn’t yet reconciled that I was a working mom. I was convinced I could be the “room mom” in all the elementary classes, be present for every naptime cuddle, and I was still convinced I should be making every meal. I wanted to be everything to everyone, and I wanted to make it all work.
Spoiler alert: Wanting to be everything to everyone is often the preamble to a breakdown of epic proportions.
I had also just begun to travel to teach and preach at conferences, which felt like a great way to use my God-given gifts and empower other women.
But because I didn’t love being away from my kids, I’d load up on family time before and after being away—trying desperately to make sure that no one felt my absence, that no one else paid for me stepping into my calling.
You can imagine who did pay in the end.
What really tripped me up was that I wasn’t trying to be all things for the approval of others; rather, it was the recognition that everything mattered.
I was driven by a deep-seated belief that my work was important, my family was necessary, and for me to steward it well—I had to do it all. I had this much right—yes, all of it mattered deeply! But it wasn’t all on me, and I was struggling because I believed the subtle lie that it was. People needed the finances from our business; they needed their salaries . . . so I had to keep pushing.
My kids needed a loving, present mom . . . so I had to keep pushing.
Our church needed attention, care, prayer, and shepherding . . . so I had to keep pushing.
There weren’t a lot of warning signs, but if I’m honest—there also wasn’t anyone telling me, “You don’t have to do it all.” Because I didn’t express my exhaustion and because I was working under the assumption that if it was hard, it was my fault: no one knew I was struggling.
Pretending like you can handle everything, even when you’re exhausted, is the surest way to burn out fast.
Looking back, I have so much compassion for that woman, desperate to keep going. She was convinced that she was the problem, that she’d let everyone down with her weakness, and that her fatigue was a failure.
I was still buying the lie that I had to push through, that somehow exhaustion was a badge of honor, and that this is just the way it was. I thought it might be better, the constant fatigue, in a different season. I wasn’t ready to change my life to experience life change.
This tumble, this terrific fall, wasn’t my last. Because this is the truth about being tired: it will get worse if it doesn’t get better.
There aren’t a lot of sexy stories about wild, life changing rest and here’s one reason why: we won’t experience real, lasting, eternal rest here on earth.
The bad news is that while we live under the effects of a fallen world and experience the pain and tension of corruptible bodies, we will always long for the complete recreation and blissful peace that heaven promises us.
The good news is that we can stop feeling shame about our fatigue and learn to live within the boundaries and limits of our human bodies while we eagerly look forward to the renewal and rest of eternity.
We will always crave heaven-sized rest in our human bodies, but we will always be left wanting more.
Our bodies will continue to break under the weight of the spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion we’ve grown accustomed to. Our relationships will suffer: with God, with one another, and most assuredly with ourselves—we won’t recognize who we are or how we got here. We’ll buckle under the weight of anxiety, overwhelm, and stress will seep into every pore of our bodies until inflammation, fatigue, defeat, and depression are the norm.
I wonder what it would look like if you and I began to view accepting God’s gift of rest here on this earth as His compassionate and merciful condolence for that which is too much for us.
Our Father doesn’t give us rest to be cute, He gives us rest because WE NEED IT. He gives us rest because He is wildly compassionate to His children who live under the effects of a fallen world. If you have carried shame about feeling fatigue, in the name of Jesus—now is the time to get rid of it. You don’t need rest because you’re weak, you need rest because this life is too much—at best. Which is why our fully-human, fully-God friend and Savior also hit moments of exhaustion on earth. It’s a condition of being alive, of being a human in the now and not yet kingdom of God.
This side of heaven, rest will never be a one-and-done cure-all. But it will be our ongoing practice and gift to receive from God who always meets us in our weariest places.
Excerpted from Tired of Being Tired: Receive God’s Realistic Rest for Your Soul-Deep Exhaustion © 2024 Jess Connolly. Used by permission of Baker Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group.
