DEFINITION: The act of being in a relationship that brings out the best version of you while also learning selflessness, humility, and love.
Your girl Sadie Rob sharing here. The two biggest aspects to entering into a relationship is knowing when you are ready to date and being able to identify when it is the right relationship.
How do you know when you are ready to date?
This answer is coming from a humble place, because had I known this when I was 16, I would have saved people and myself from a lot of heartache. Looking back, I am truly sad to say that out of my brokenness, I would get into relationships because I “needed” something. Of course, at the time, I didn’t realize my impure motives. I never intentionally thought, going into a relationship, that I was trying to “get something” out of anyone, but I can see now that I was searching for something.
I needed self-confidence, reassurance, affirmation, healing, someone to make me feel less lonely, someone to redeem the past. I went into every relationship needing something that only Jesus could give me. When it ended it left me feeling emptier than when I started. I think you are ready to date when you find contentment in Christ and don’t actually “need anything from anyone.” You have to realize that they cannot and will not give you what only Jesus can give you.
How do you know when it is the right relationship?
First off, I want to touch on how you can know you’re in a WRONG relationship. One good clue is to look at who you have become since dating that person. If you have lost your personality, your peace, your joy, your confidence, your purity and the desires inside of you, then it’s probably time to lose the relationship and find yourself again in Christ. The wrong relationship will produce the wrong fruit. If you have to change who you are, it’s not the right relationship.
The right relationship will produce the right fruit in you and through you. It will bless you, not take from you.
Ask yourself questions like: “Since the beginning of this relationship, have I seen the fruit of Jesus in my life?” No one is going to be perfect, so don’t look for perfect, but you can be and should be HEALTHY!
The other thing is when you realize the one you are dating is really “the one”, it won’t be some magical moment with bells ringing and pixie dust falling from the sky and seven shooting stars flashing across the sky like a July 4th celebration. You won’t get a “sign” written by the universe that he is the one. I think so many times we get caught up in looking for a sign.
The looking causes us to miss the actual magic of how God brings two people together. How he creates one to complete the other. Stop looking for crazy signs around you and look in front of you. That way you can see that what you prayed for is standing right there. Look inside of you and realize who you have become by the power and blessing of partnering with who God has created.
If you happen to find this right relationship in college, what a blessing! If not, God is preparing you for something that only a season of singleness can bring about. Those years are sweet if you can have the eyes to see it through that lens. Don’t wish it away.
TRUTH: Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
How can you apply this scripture to your perspective of dating?1. What are you looking for in a dating relationship?
2. What could God be wanting to show you in your season of singleness or dating?
3. What are some ways you could start preparing for the person God has for you?