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Why We Have to Break Up With Comparison

by | Nov 12, 2024 | Featured, Jealousy & Comparison, LO Library

Comparison loves to ruin my contentment.

For me, it usually starts when I’ve finished a peaceful time with Jesus in the morning. When I’ve not only managed to get up early to read my Bible, but I’m also feeling genuinely connected to God. His Word is alive. I literally want to sing shouts of praise. I resolve to start my day thinking, God is so good, and I’m thankful for the many blessings he has given me! 

After I’ve said prayers of gratitude and found a positive outlook for the day ahead, I reach for my phone. I wonder what’s happening on social media this morning. Almost instantly, my mood changes…

I see that a group of my friends got together last night for a beautiful dinner. All smiling and laughing in beautiful dresses and making inside jokes to each other in the comments. And they didn’t invite me. 

Another friend announces she and her model-looking husband and perfect matching-outfitted children are expecting yet another baby.

An influencer I follow has posted from her lavish beach vacation, sporting her perfect sculpted abs in a bikini. 

Before I throw my phone across the room with envy, I see another friend got engaged. Did I mention how massive the ring is? 

It takes all of three minutes for my morning of gratitude to get hijacked by jealousy. Discontentment can grow easily when we are distracted by comparison.

If we’re honest, in a social media driven world, we all struggle with comparison. 

But here is something really important to acknowledge: comparison is actually a sin. 

The Bible says we’re not supposed to covet our neighbor, and comparison is rooted in coveting. (See Exodus 20:17) It’s not a new problem in 2024 because we have access to see what everyone else has or is doing at the swipe of our finger; it’s something we’ve struggled with since the beginning of time. 

Like any sin though, we have to cut it off at the root. We have to treat it like it’s ruining our lives, because it is!

Comparison is one of the enemy’s ploys against us as we live out who we’re called to be in Christ. If Satan can get us fixated on all the things we aren’t or things we don’t have, we will get stuck there. Instead of running after what God has called us to do, we will run after something else.

But when we quit playing the comparison game and instead consider Jesus as our prize, we win.

One of my favorite Bible verses is Philippians 3:14: “I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” Paul wrote these words from prison, but he was looking to the prize. To him, nothing was greater than eternity with Jesus.

Contentment and comparison cannot coexist. And if contentment is found inwardly, we cannot go looking for it externally.

It starts with choosing not to look at other people’s lives as markers of where we need to be. When we’re so busy looking at what God is doing in them, we miss what He’s doing in us. We miss what He has already done.

If you are struggling with this today, here are three invitations for you:

Spend time alone with God in His Word. Remind yourself of His love for you by reading the stories of what He has done and what He will do.

Ask the Holy Spirit to examine your heart and reveal where you’ve sought to find satisfaction in external things.

Allow God to trade your limited, earthly perspective for hope in His eternal promises.

Friend, God’s plan for your life is not meant to be compared to His plan for anyone else. Who God has called you to be is unique. How God is molding you into that person is also intentional (Psalm 139:13-14).

May we be willing to shift our gaze from what everyone around us is doing and see what God is doing in us.

Here is a prayer to get you started: God, I confess I’ve looked with envy at what You are doing in the lives of people around me. But I know all the things they have, the things I want, will never satisfy me in the ways Jesus does. Show me how to stop comparing so I can find true contentment in You alone. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Meghan Ryan Asbury is an author and speaker who is passionate about helping people find and live out their God-given callings. She’s worked in ministry both on college campuses and internationally as well as with Proverbs 31 Ministries. Her first book, You Are Not Behind: Building a Life You Love Without Having Everything You Want, is now available. When she’s not surrounded by friends, you can usually find her reading a book or doing something outdoors. A Florida beach girl born and raised, she and her husband currently live in Nashville, Tennessee. You can connect with her on Instagram @meghanryanasbury and at alwaysmeghan.com.

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