a travelin’ lady.
I had all these words written out about redemption to share with y’all. They were beautiful and they still matter, but I’m going to save those for another time.
I sat awake last night wrestling with this itch in my spirit, that kept reminding me that something is missing. Better yet, someone was missing. As I started to get really heavy, the wound I have spent years trying to understand and heal up started to sting again. You see, this time of year is a hard one for me. There is a constant echo and ache in my heart for the people that are supposed to be in my life who are not. The holidays are a reminder of that.
This time of year, is about family.
It’s about Jesus.
It’s about celebrating.
It’s about joy.
It’s about rest.
But what if some of the pieces are missing? What about my loved ones who don’t know Jesus? What if my family is not like everyone else’s? What if my Mother hasn’t wished me a Happy Birthday or a Merry Christmas in years? What do I do with that? How do I fill that gap? I immediately find comfort in Jesus. He has always been and will always be the gap filler in my life. So, I ask Him to show up. To bring peace to my heavy spirit. I open up my bible and turn to Psalms. I always find comfort there.
The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. (Psalm 9:9)
God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. (Psalm 46:1)
There is so much comfort hidden in His words. I keep searching and reading until I feel like the wound has healed up a little bit.
May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. (Romans 15:13).
A God of Hope. He brings peace, He brings joy—even when it feels too far to reach. My sweet Jesus. In my brokenness and in my yearning, he still allows me to overflow. That’s the Jesus I am celebrating this season, no matter who is in or out of my life.
So, maybe this time of year is hard for you. Maybe people who are supposed to be in your world to celebrate are gone. Maybe they won’t show up. Maybe you are still struggling with grief and loss, and instead of being joyful during the holidays, you are angry. Whatever you are struggling with, please know you are not alone. I pinkie promise you. I want to say words to comfort you, but sometimes they aren’t enough. Let Jesus be the gap filler. Let Him be the one to calm the storm.
Run to Jesus. Find rest in Him. Pull your strength from God.