by Brittany Price-Brooker | Apr 27, 2018 | Testimonies |
It was the middle of the night and I sat there in the darkness, feeding my little newborn snuggled in my arms, with hot tears falling from my cheeks and landing on his. I kept saying, “God this is more than I can handle, how can I do this? How can I live like this?” I rocked in that rocking chair trying to make sense of my reality. Just days before, everything in my life had been turned upside down and I was still in shock that this was my life. My beloved husband had suddenly and unexpectedly died at age 30. He kissed me goodbye before he left for work, and within hours, he was in the presence of Jesus. I was left here with our precious three boys who were all under the age of three. I was exhausted from grief, the weight of death and the overwhelming thoughts of doing the future alone. I didn’t know how people could live through this crushing weight, yet here I was—awake and trying to take care of my baby, while my heart was broken into pieces. Death had stolen my amazing life I had and loved. This trial, this life of suffering I was called to bear, was really too much for me to handle on my own and it really was too overwhelming to even grasp. So many questions, thoughts and worries filled my mind of how I was going to make it through the unthinkable.
All I remember is suddenly in that room, through the cloud of grief hovering over me, I didn’t feel alone. I felt a comforting presence surrounding me. Jesus began to remind me of His truth, that because of sin and brokenness of the world, we will experience more than we can handle on our own. However, He promised to come and carry our burdens for us, to never forsake us, to guard our heart with peace in the storm, to never slumber or sleep but to gently carry us through each storm. God was reminding me that no matter what I tried to do or the strength I tried to muster on my own, I could not handle this trial alone. He alone could handle this. There were so many days where I felt as if I should be drowning, but instead I was floating on God’s mighty grace. His grace was something that was overwhelming and truly felt supernatural—that’s how He always works, in our utter weakness His strength is made more perfect and powerful so that He gets the glory, not us.
That night and for all these years, the strength of God’s arms have wrapped around my weak body and weary heart, and helped me stand when it was hard to even move. God alone has given strength to sing His praises through the stormy nights, even through the tears and the questions. He still gave a sacrifice of praise that I could whisper through the pain filled days. Even though this trial has been more than I could ever handle, I have never once had to handle it alone. God has always given me His portion when I asked. Jesus truly is enough, not our security in this life, nor our comfort in this world, not health, not in perfect relationships, not in living out our dream, not in our family looking the way we want, but just Jesus, He is the only lasting Hope, our greatest reward, and the greatest portion. He becomes enough when we loosen our grip on this world that we look to for fulfillment and instead cling to Christ with all we have, knowing He is sufficient for all our needs.
If Jesus can walk me through the valley of the shadow of death, I know He will walk you through your deepest pains and give you strength to call on His name. The reality is oftentimes, our situations are too much to handle, but that’s why God has not called us to do it alone. He wants to show us that HE can handle it. There is nothing too great that God cannot carry us through. Jesus bore the greatest weight of sin, death and brokenness on the cross, sacrificing everything so that we didn’t have to. He died and rose again, defeating death so that we can live abundantly in Him. Jesus longs for us to call on His name and exchange our total weakness for His everlasting strength.
May we trust Him in whatever comes our way—even when it is more than we can handle, thanking Christ that we never have to walk this life alone.
by Brittany Price-Brooker | Mar 19, 2018 | Testimonies
Shame. It’s something that has been woven into so many stories—not welcomed, but something that has come in to take room in our hearts and take our attention. Incredible people with amazing hearts and giftings are filled with guilt and condemnation, and it holds audience with their mind, saying they will never be what they had once dreamed.
For most of us, shame is the one thing that keeps us from embracing God’s forgiveness and living in His abundant joy. So, how do we deal with this obstacle to forgiveness and have a thriving relationship with God? We simply choose to take God at His word, and believe that His love truly washes clean our sin and shame. God’s word says, “As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us.” (Psalm 103:12)
Therefore, there is now no condemnation [no guilty verdict, no punishment] for those who are in Christ Jesus [who believe in Him as personal Lord and Savior]. (Romans 8:1AMP)
On the cross, Jesus took our sin and the shame that comes with it and removed them far from us. He reminds us in scripture that because of Christ, there is no longer condemnation. He has already lifted our burdens so that the weight of sin and shame would not hold us down from running the race He has called us to.
The enemy wants us to live in defeat, but Christ wants us to live in victory.
Defeat says, “I’m too far gone. No one wants me. God doesn’t care for me because I don’t deserve his love and never will. I will give up because I will mess up again and can’t get past my shame.” Victory says, “God I know I have messed up, please forgive me and give me strength to live for you. I know you covered all my sins, past, present, and future on the cross and through the name of Jesus Christ there is victory.”
Jesus came to give up His life as a ransom for us—people He already knew would sin and struggle. He came to defeat the hold that death, shame and isolation had on our life. He wants to bring us who were in darkness into His glorious light. He wants us, just as we are. Broken, needy and fully aware that we are unable to do this life on our own. We can either let shame hold us down or allow belief in Him to lift us up to victory. Freedom is ours when we break free of our shame and walk in His grace. No longer captive, but free in Christ.
by Brittany Price-Brooker | Feb 21, 2018 | Relationships |
When we are young, most of us dream about falling in love and marrying that one person, who lights up our life and brings us more happiness than we have ever felt. First, we experience that undeniable chemistry and attraction that draws us to each other, then the love and infatuation that grows between you makes you choose this person for life. Finally, marriage happens, and we experience what is commonly referred to as the “honeymoon stage”. However, for most marriages, it’s only a matter of time before it becomes obvious that the person you picked to be first in your life tends to become last. We tend to forget that the beautiful garden of our relationship that we started came as a result of placing our spouse above everyone else, spending significant time pursuing their heart, and caring for their needs above our own. We still have the same plants and flowers in the garden that is our marriage, but with comfort can come casual effort, and what we once cared for and watered has become neglected and overgrown.
As a young widow, I saw couples all around me who had all the opportunity to flourish in their marriage but chose other things instead. I saw them complaining of simple, everyday things that I would have given anything to be experiencing with a husband, because at least that would mean that my husband was alive. For some wives, picking up after their husband or doing laundry was a task that made them feel like a servant. For me, as I folded our laundry at night, tears would often fill my eyes as I ached for the opportunity once again to fold his shirts and show him in little way that I loved him and wanted to take care of him.
It’s through this season that I became the world’s biggest cheerleader of marriages, dates and getaways—always being thrilled when I saw couples taking time out of their fast-paced schedules, to be intentional with having fun with each other and keeping that spark alive. Something I wished I could have continued to do. I never regretted one dime that my late husband and I worked hard to sacrificially spend on a weekend together or a date night. Those memories and moments were not time and money wasted, it was an investment in our relationship. When life gets flipped upside down, you remember what truly matters in life, and the memories, relationships and things done for eternity cannot be taken away by circumstances.
Marriage is a picture of the gospel, because it is a relationship that shows the world that this person has my deepest affections and is greater than my own needs and wants. Just like Jesus is greater, and He picks us and chooses to take care of us, what a sweet gift. But, do our marriages truly display this beautiful picture of laying down our lives for our spouses? Loving them and taking care of their needs above our own? Do we realize the gift of having each other, our person who we can do life with? Or do we take for granted this treasure of being one and partnering in life together?
I recently remarried to a widower, and because of our past, we live our present out very differently. We both lost our beloved spouses in the prime of their lives, our best friends and partners in life. We were able to measure their value, not only by the impact they had on our life, but also by the deep void they left in our heart. As a result. we do marriage differently. We try and not let the little things of life steal the joy of today. The messy house and kids’ craziness (we have 5). We intentionally spend time together—praying, dreaming, laughing and watering the garden we have been given, so it will flourish.
People often can look at another marriage and say the grass is greener on the other side, but the reality is nothing flourishes without being daily watered and cultivated with the attention and care it needs to grow. Plants either slowly grow and flourish, or slowly wither. Both can happen over time, and both yield costly and noticeable results. Often, the marriages that seem to be withering didn’t happen overnight, they happened through years of not cultivating the garden they had been given. Weeds can slowly take over, and if they are not taken out by the root, they can overtake the once flourishing plant. Instead of having a beautiful garden, you have a wilting weed bed that doesn’t reflect beauty.
We all have choices in life to make. We all have the same 24 hours, and the same opportunities to do work in our own hearts and families and cultivate something beautiful.
God’s word gives us the key to all relationships in Philippians 2:3: Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
The key to cultivating relationships, is to serve each other and count one another more significant than yourselves. Most conflict surfaces because of sin that is rooted in thinking of ourselves and our needs above everyone else. None of us may have perfect marriages, but we can seek the perfect God and father of our hearts to lead and guide us in His ways, and give us the ability to respond in His strength and water the relationships He has given us. Marriage is a gift, not something holding us down. It’s a precious gift that Jesus ordained to bring Him glory. When we view our spouse as a gift, it helps us value, protect and be purposeful with that treasure.
So, what are you doing to water and care for your garden? What are you doing to pull up the weeds by their roots? Are you willing to allow the Water of God’s word and Spirit to loosen the weeds, so they can more easily be removed and make room for your relationship to thrive? It’s never too late to water the plants you have been given. It’s never too late to share with your spouse about the weeds you have allowed to grow. It’s never too late to lay your life down for each other. There is always beauty ahead with Jesus, and there is always room for growth. Let’s allow Him to do His perfect and complete work, yielding a result that brings Him glory as we live out the gospel in our relationships.
by Brittany Price-Brooker | Jan 8, 2018 | Life Advice |
We have all had those days, when everything feels like it’s going wrong. Relationships that were once solid, now seem fragile. Finances feel extra tight, schedules become overwhelming, and it seems like our world is starting to fall in on us. We start to focus more on how difficult our life has become and the weariness we are feeling, with the weight of the world on our shoulders. It’s right about that point that our perspective can shift away from what we do have, to what we don’t have—and we go from confiding in people who understand how we feel, to thinking no one understands the way we are feeling.
Just like everyone else, I have gone through so many days when I felt completely overwhelmed, and I gave in to the wrong thoughts. But, then there were days when God shifted my thoughts away from my daily problems, to an eternal perspective. And even though my circumstances didn’t change right away, my view of them certainly did.
One thing that helped me with this shift in perspective, was to simply make a list of what I did have in my life, instead of listing out what I didn’t have. No matter how difficult my day was, I was always able to find at least one thing to be grateful for. Focusing on the victories, no matter how small they were, instead of the defeats, no matter how big they were, gave my heart a chance to rest in a God who sees and loves me, no matter what I am going through.
Scripture tells us to take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5) God knows that we struggle with our thoughts, so He reminds us that we can boldly take those unhealthy thoughts that fill our mind with bitterness and fears, and replace them with thoughts that make us better because of Jesus. We become the most discouraged when we allow our thoughts, fears and exhaustion to take over our mind, instead of the truth of God’s Word that He loves us and is working everything out for our good, even when we don’t understand and we can’t see it.
We can give all our thoughts of hurt, anger, unforgiveness and questions to God, He can handle it all. God’s power and ability to overcome is greater than our problems. When the emotions start flooding our mind, we have a choice to make in that moment—are we going to try and handle this in our own abilities and strength, or are we going to turn to Christ for His wisdom and strength? He is the only One who knows our heart, our past, present and our future. When we choose in that moment to start giving God all of our frustrations and pray it out, literally laying all of our burdens at His feet (1 Peter 5:7), God can shift our perspective from ourselves to Him, the One who is carrying our burdens and carrying us.
That is why when we choose to wallow in the pain, instead of going to God first, we are allowing these difficult realities to rule our mind—which in turn starts shifting the way we look at our life. It’s a choice we all have. When we change our perspective on our circumstances, it doesn’t make our problems just go away, but it helps us to depend on Christ and come through the difficulty better instead of bitter.
A lot of times, we don’t have the luxury of changing our circumstances, but we can ask that through the circumstances God would change us. Perspective changes us, it challenges us and reminds us of what truly matters in this brief life we are given. So, no matter how hard of a circumstance you are facing, know that through Christ and the truth of His word and His promises, we can find hope and comfort to shift our thinking and help us view things in light of His perspective.
by Brittany Price-Brooker | Dec 18, 2017 | Life Advice |
Christmas is the most magical, family oriented, memory making time of the year. Each holiday season brings new delights and laughter, as we make new memories and relive the old ones. But this joyous time can also bring a lot of difficult memories for some, and act as a reminder of what was and what is no longer. For some, it’s a reminder of a dream that will never be fulfilled, and although there are beautiful lights and music all around, their heart feels the shadow of the season and a lonely silence where music once was. It can be the most wonderful time of the year or one of the most hurtful times.
Last year, I remember walking through one of those hard parts of Christmas. I was right in the middle of trying to choose joy, when my heart was aching and I felt like God began to open my eyes to what Christmas was for me. I felt as if the word Emmanuel, God with us, was running through my heart, and reminding me that I had a reason to feel joy—even through the difficult moments of the season. It was obvious that God was right there with me.
Christmas isn’t just about family we spend our time with or the memories we make, it’s about the fact that Jesus gave up everything—came as a baby, to live and die so that we didn’t have to do life alone, ever! Jesus is not shuffling my hurt to the side and telling me it doesn’t matter. Christmas is Jesus coming down to be with me, telling me He sees my great pain, and He is there to carry it. He is coming to be my counselor when my thoughts are scattered, my peace in the storm, a strong and mighty warrior when the fight seems to hard, and a sweet comforter when the sorrow overwhelms me. He is God with me, in the loneliest of moments, and He is there in the midst of the hard of Christmas, to be our HOPE.
For many of us, our lives may look different in this season than we wished, but there is so much beauty and meaning that is revealed as we focus on what we do have in Jesus—instead of what we don’t have in this world. So, in the midst of the hard this Christmas, may we experience the hope of Emmanuel, who came to be with us, the hope in the hard.
