Over the past few months, being “far from God” was something I would use to describe my own relationship with Him. I would spend time journaling and write something like this: “God, I feel so far from You. My quiet time isn’t the same. I don’t hear from you as clearly. I don’t feel as bold. I am just not as close to You as I used to be.”

Have you ever felt that way? Or said that to God?

Well, if you have, now you know you’re not alone. And we’re not going to sit in that feeling any longer, because I have some good news for you. Recently, when I was journaling, I was mid-sentence when the Holy Spirit spoke so clearly. That usually happens between Jesus and me. He often uses His Spirit to speak to me when I’m in the middle of writing in my journal. It’s like He cuts me off mid-rant and speaks so gently to my heart. As I was mid-sentence writing something like, “God, I feel so far from Yo…” I stopped. The Spirit then shifted my heart to write this next to it:

“You’re not far from me. That’s a lie you’ve been believing, which has then shifted your obedience toward Me.”

Oh. Could I really have been believing a lie from the enemy that I am far from God? Because to me, I thought I was simply analyzing the state of our relationship and coming to the conclusion that I was far from Him. But I guess I had been believing a lie. The devil had been feeding me this lie through every “unanswered prayer.” If I asked God a question and didn’t hear an immediate answer, the enemy would sneak lies into my heart that I was growing farther from Him.When I would miss a quiet time because I was caring for my toddler’s needs, I believed the lie. When I got distracted in worship because of a fussy baby on my hip, I believed the lie.

I was believing something that was slowly pushing me away from my Father.

Before I was a full-time mother and self-employed photographer, I worked in full-time ministry. Eight hours of my day were focused on talking about how we could bring Jesus to more people, how we could share the good news of the Gospel with others. It was amazing—a dream job, truly. Then I got pregnant and made the decision to stay home and care for my baby while also pursuing self-employment. But something shifted then. My season had changed. In the midst of my life changing, so did my relationship with God. Somewhere in the middle of that transition, I subconsciously believed the lie from the enemy that because our relationship had changed, it meant I was far from God. Instead of meeting for prayer every day at 8 a.m. at work, gathering with other believers, and worshiping for an hour daily. I tried to fit my quiet time into the mornings before my newborn woke up—which didn’t happen often. Now, I try to focus on my morning reading while Mickey Mouse plays in the background and I attempt to keep my toddler in one place for at least ten minutes—which also isn’t the most ideal quiet time setting.

My season has clearly changed, and things looked very different in the way I connected with God and found space to meet with Him. So I believed the lie: “I’m far from God.” When the Lord revealed to my heart that I was believing a lie, something immediately shifted in me. It was like a blanket had been lifted from my eyes. The lies flooded out of my heart, and the truth I had always believed and stood firm on came back to the surface. “I am not far from God!” I said it to myself with a confused look on my face, almost baffled that I could have believed anything else. One thing about my relationship with God is that I have always been so confident in who I am in Him. God’s Word is true, alive, active, and never changing. And God has some wonderfully true things to say about you in His Word.

Just read a few:

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light.” (1 Peter 2:9)

“For you created my inner being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearful and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that fully well.” (Psalm 139:13-14)

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.”

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” (2 Corinthians 5:17) 

When I came to the realization of what the devil had been saying to me, it all started to make sense. The devil would never tell me the lie that “God is FAR from ME.” He twisted it. Instead, he was telling me, “I am far from God.” Because when it comes to the devil telling me lies about my God, he knows that’s never going to work. I have God’s Word to stand against every lie the enemy tries to tell me about who my God is.

Deuteronomy 31:6 says:

“Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

And Joshua 1:9 says:

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

The Word is very clear about our Father always being near. I also know that Jesus loves me so much, and He will never forsake me—even in a change of season. When I was believing the lie that I was far from God, it was really the enemy trying to shake my identity in Christ. I am confident that when I gave my life to Jesus, His Holy Spirit came to dwell within me, making me closer to Him than I have ever been. And one day, I will sit with Him and worship Him forever in Heaven. So even though the way I connect with God may be different now, it doesn’t mean I am far from Him. It simply means we communicate in a new way. Now I call on Him when I am rocking my baby to sleep and ask for His nearness—and I feel Him. I pray to Him when I am driving in the car with a napping baby and lullabies playing in the background. I hear the Gospel through children’s books that describe the love of God through flip pages and animated teddy bears. God’s nearness never fails. Even in a change of season, He is near. If you have ever felt “far from God,” I urge you to sit with Jesus and ask Him if you’re believing a lie from the enemy. Ask God to reveal how He is showing Himself to you in new ways during your current season. Because if you have accepted Jesus into your heart, you are near to Him, and He is near to you.