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Finding My Roar

by | Oct 17, 2017 | Testimonies | 51 comments

“I am a lion finding its roar

I was just a shadow, but now I’m much more.

I will no longer be silent.

I will no longer be still.

I am a lion who found their roar.”

I found this poem I wrote last November. As I read it, I began to think about all the emotions you feel when comparison takes over.  “I was just a shadow, but now I’m much more” during the time I was writing this, I was overcoming a battle of comparison. I had just really started looking like my sister, Sadie. Although I love this compliment so much, I was also getting comments like “Wow! You look so much like Sadie, but she’s the prettier one.” For a long time, I let comments like these come in and steal my joy. I let comments like that define me.

In the midst of feeling like I was in the shadow of Sadie, I found myself in another shadow – the shadow of HIS wing, and of all places that is where I found my roar. I found my confidence in the sacred place. Little did I know, that would soon be where I thrived. After I began to get in touch with Jesus, I found that I could be so powerful if I just had confidence! I had to stop trying to be confident in the things that stole my confidence, and that I was just a lot different than Sadie.

Sometimes, we try to find confidence in what we think others find their confidence in because it may look cool or be the “IT” thing, but the only place that got me was a shadow. When your mindset is all on Jesus and not another person, confidence comes relatively easy. When your focus is on a person you find comparison, but when your mindset is on Jesus you overflow with confidence.

When I thought I had to be like Sadie, a pressure came on me that began to silence my roar. But as I searched for my voice in whom Jesus made me to be, I realized who Bella was. Guess what, she’s a lot different then Sadie and really everyone in my family. Can you relate? Well, if you on the other side of the screen know exactly how it feels can I just say this…IT IS NORMAL AND OKAY TO BE DIFFERENT. That is what makes the body of Christ so beautiful. It actually makes Sadie and I a more powerful pair of sisters because of our differences. She has taught me how to live original, and I have taught her how to live fearless. When we understand our differences can be our greatest strengths, we empower each other to be the strongest, boldest and loudest we have ever been.

Here are some things about me:

I love to cook. Sadie almost set our house on fire trying to make mac and cheese. I love to sit in my space and listen to music. Sadie has never been into music. If it’s Friday night, you will find me cheering on all my guy friends at a football game, and Sadie would be calling the quarter’s innings. I love to be the person behind the camera taking Sadie’s picture. She literally has to beg me to take a pic with her. It’s just not my thing. I can out sass anyone in my family. I have mastered the dry sense of humor and sarcasm if a craft – don’t even try using sarcasm on Sadie because it goes right over her head. When I finally found out these are just parts of what makes me, ME, and not what makes me opposite of my sister, my roar got louder once again.

Without Jesus, none of this would’ve been made possible. Jesus helped me understand my worth, and to know your worth is to have confidence. If you truly believe your worthless, then where is your confidence? Jesus died on the cross to show you that you are worth more than you could EVER imagine, and that is what I am confident in. I have confidence because I know I am worth more. I have come a long way in my relationship with Jesus, and I still have got a long way to go. I pray that my journey through this will open your eyes and see what Jesus is trying to do in your heart, and with everything in me I hope you find your ROAR.

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51 Comments

  1. Olivia Wilbanks

    Wow, this is so good!!!!! Thank you for this. I have felt the comparison from my older sister all my life, as well. She was more athletic, she was prettier, she made better grades. It was suffocating me until I realized I needed to learn who I was despite my sister, and I have come a longgg way thanks to the help from our amazing God. Proud of you for finding your roar, and I hope I can too! God bless you!

  2. Margie Lozano

    This was grrreat lol I had to!!! But honestly it was amazing!

  3. chrys howard

    All of us younger sisters have to find our own roar. Thank you, Bella, for your honesty in looking at the subject that affects so many. You are your own light–bright and beautiful. As a younger sister myself, I had to find my own roar and shine my own light. Love you sweet girl!

  4. Sue Jaske

    Very good Bella, everyone is different,if we weren’t life would be pretty boring.

  5. Grace Hoffpauir

    so much truth. keep doing you, girl

  6. Katie Hopper

    This is awesome! I can relate so much, thank you!

  7. Evelyn Statham

    This is great!!! ♥️♥️You are amazing!!!♥️♥️

  8. Bethany Otto

    Beautifully said. As the mom of three teen sisters, I am hoping they all read your post (they all follow this blog). There’s a lot of comparison and finding their own individual voices is a process they are experiencing right now.

  9. Kari Louthan

    Wow!! Amazing post! Thank you so much for the encouragement…this speaks volumes to me!❤️

  10. Amanda Wilson

    Very well written! Comparison is the thief of joy. I’m happy that you have found your roar! God is molding you into exactly who you were meant to be! Beautiful girl inside and out and covered by Jesus! Keep on this wild ride with Jesus, there are countless treasures in trusting him with your worth!

  11. Mary Grace McGhee

    This is just what I needed to hear today! Thank you so much!

  12. Salley Burkart

    What wonderful insight. I admire the young lady Jesus has inspired you to become. He is truly, The Way, The Truth, & The life.
    Blessings?

  13. Lily Mason

    This is amazing! It really is going to help me!

  14. Janelle Kraus

    Beautifully written! This is something ALL women can relate to! Oh, how the enemy loves to use comparison to steal and overshadow who WE are meant to be in Christ JESUS. I can tell you have a beautiful heart that Jesus is USING already! Embrace all that you are, it’s beautiful, inside and out!

  15. Brenna Martinez

    Bella Bella Bella. It’s incredible to me that at such a young age, you were able to eloquently and beautifully talk about such a vulnerable topic. I’ve been following you for a while now, and I love Sadie’s post as well. While I find you both inspiring in different ways, you have always stood out to me more than anyone else. because of how original YOU are. I love so much that you’re different and I LOVE that you do your own thing and have confidence in yourself. Girl, it shows! Isn’t it funny how all along, I found you to be inspiring, most beautiful and confident, when this was the very thing you were struggling with? You truly are so much greater in the sight of God that in the sight of your own vision. And know that others see that in you <3

  16. Kylie Gillespie

    Bella this is incredible! Such a powerful message and I love it! Exactly what I needed today crazy how God works in our lives!!!

  17. Maddie Gill

    Bella, I know from reading this that it is going to help me a lot! I’m only a few months younger than you and I feel as if I can relate quit a bit. Thank you for sharing these inspiring words poured out from God! ❤

  18. Tara Kingsley

    What an incredibley encouraging story! I’m
    glad you found your ROAR ?.. Your name is fitting for you! I love how that works out. . . ?

  19. Rachel Ortiz

    This legit made me cry and I can relate because I to lost my roar and I feel like I had to get it back but I didn’t know how so I thought I was acting like myself but truly I was acting more like my sister and doing things that she liked and finding myself doing a lot of things that she liked than what I like all though we both like the same thing but I don’t as much I love be loud and share joy and be happy and I’m not saying she is but she finds me annoying. I was so excited to read your blog hoping I would find something I can relate to this was definitely it. Thank you so much for sharing this lots of love. good bless you and your family.

  20. sarah bigney

    this was so encouraging. i constantly find myself comparing myself to others & feeling worthless when i see the results. it’s so cool to see how God is using you at such a young age!

  21. Jamie Morrison

    I am so glad that I clicked on the link for this. It is written beautifully with an even more beautiful message. You are on the path of doing great things through Jesus, Bella. It warms my 34 year old heart to know that young girls have you (and your family) to look to as a role model. Keep on keeping on, Miss Robertson!

  22. H Q

    Thank you Bella! Good message to hear! I have six sisters and no brothers.

  23. Nirmal Tari

    Oh how I loved hearing from you Bella! In a day and age where young public figures try to be perfect via whatever means of fakeness money can buy, we have young Christian beauties like yourself that shine because of their authentic vulnerability. You are the real deal making an impact on young lives and exposing the lies that hold down many. Thank you truly!

  24. Carmen Stone

    Bella, I LOVE this! At your age, my “Sadie” was a trio of popular, beautiful sisters that I couldn’t seem to ever be like, no matter how hard I tried. I didn’t start finding my “roar” until college, and even now as a 32 year old, when comparison creeps in, I need to run back to Jesus to be reminded who I am. I love that you are learning this now, and honestly, I needed this today. Thank you. I love thinking of it as my “roar.” That term is really going to stick with me, especially the next time comparison tries to sneak in. Blessings sista!

  25. Acelyn Mills

    I really needed this Bella, thank you so much❤️

  26. Emilu May

    Wowowow this is so good. I constantly struggle with comparison and learning to let my rosar out. Thanks for being so vulnerable and reminding all of us this truth – that only Jesus can fill us up and make us confident in him.

  27. Julie Rogers

    Life changing. I have struggled with comparison and my worth and I’ve come to realize that I can’t be the person I’m comparing myself to, I can only be who God created me to be. The words you wrote in this post are absolutely beautiful and exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you so much for sharing your heart Bella!

  28. Casey Wesley

    I love this post. I have struggled with comparing myself to other girls and this article has really helped me. I love this blog post and I want to get closer to Jesus so I can find my roar as well. So I won’t compare myself to other people. I want to love who I am and embrace my differences. Thanks Bella for this post. I love you and Sadie and I love Jesus 🙂

  29. Terra Guerrero

    Thank you for this post. I’ve been struggling with depression cause of medical issues I’ve had for 2 yrs and this makes me feel not so alone

  30. Michelle Saylor

    I love your story ,I struggle with knowing god .I am glad you have him in your heart ,and I am really glad he helped you get your roar back .

  31. Reina Childs

    Beautiful post ❤️ I’m constantly comparing myself to others which makes me very insecure and I want to know myself through Jesus. Thanks for sharing.

  32. Abby Lang

    As a 16 year old girl, I relate to this blog post tremendously. I’ve been trying to find who I am and searching for confidence in all the wrong places when it was in Jesus the entire time. So grateful to have him in my heart, and thank you for such a beautiful post ?

  33. Abigail Houston

    Being a 16 year old girl in a Christian school, I often feel a lot of pressure because I feel like I have to be the "perfect" Christian just because of where I go to school. I start to compare myself to other girls in my school and try to be like them. I have been trying to find my roar and I am so thankful for this inspiring blog post .

  34. Emma Downey

    This is such a great post, I compare myself to other girls as a 14 year old teenager, I especially compare myself to models, and "hot girls" when my bother calls other girls hot, and I wonder why can’t I look like that, but I am different, and that makes me, me. Thank you for this blog post, it really opened up my eyes <3

  35. Julie McGlinchey

    I love this! I’m the youngest of 4, but I’m 95% of the time compared to my older brother in almost every way, so definitely can relate to all of this!

  36. Angela S

    I love this Bella! I feel like I am often comparing myself to others around me… sometimes thinking that I’m not good enough. But God gave me the confidence to be free, different, and to shake those shackles of fear and dependence.

  37. Lauren M

    This is truly inspiring and exactly what I needed today! Thank you so much for sharing your story!

  38. Sarah Chadd

    Thank you for sharing your heart Bella! You sound like a truly amazing and beautiful person! This touched my heart because I can so relate to comparing yourself to your sister. I did the same thing and I am learning and growing just like you 🙂

  39. Emily Killen

    So good! Thanks Bella 🙂

  40. marilyn blokland

    Thank you so much Bella! ❤ you’re so beautiful!

  41. BILL CRAGG

    I Can Only Imagine, That Your Future Book You Write, Will Not Only Sell More Copies Than Anyone Else In The Family, But Will HELP People Grow In Confidence & Towards Christ In A Sincere, Permanent Way Bella. Beatiful, Strong Soul.

  42. Bayley S

    I Love this! Thank you so much for sharing this , Bella! You are loved, just the way you are! I totally need this!

  43. Cammie Morgan

    Thank you so much Bella for being fearless in the Lord. I’ve really been struggly with this recently, so thank you for sharing your story and for your encouragement.

  44. kennedie burston

    Thank you so much, Bella! I know that I too struggle with comparison that often leaves me feeling a bit worthless. And you are so right that keeping your eyes and confidence on God is the only true way to feel worthy!

  45. Maddie Summers

    Thank you Bella!!! I often use social media as a comparing site. I sit and compare myself to other beautiful girls thinking I’m not enough. You’ve opened my eyes. I will continue to pray for you and your boldness!!!

  46. Anna Cochran

    thank you so much for this! I struggle to fit in with the popular group and the society around me when I know that I’m different, and thank you for reminding me that I’m different and it’s okay to be different because being different is being beautiful. i cannot thank you enough. thanks bella?

  47. K A I T L Y N -

    So encouraged by this post! You go, girl!
    God bless,
    Kaitlyn

  48. Matt Newell

    I really like this post and poem that I came back to it to read. Please do more guy blogs and help us out.

  49. Jennifer Beman

    Wow. This post put into words everything I struggled with this year. Its so encouraging to look back and see that the reason I struggled with comparison was because I prayed for peace and contentment, and God brought to the surface what was stealing my peace and contentment in order to help me through it! He made me aware of it, made me see how deeply I was buried in it, and helped me out of it! I did a DTS with YWAM this year, and for an assignment I wrote a sermon on championing others. "Love Champions," was the title, and as I prepared for this sermon the holy Spirit led me to some hard-hitting verses, like Proverbs 14:30 for instance. It says, " A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones." Living with 30 other talented, funny, outgoing students, I had found this to be all to true. Continuing to wrestle with my incessant need to compare myself with other students and envy what they have, whether that be skills, beauty, style, friends, or whatever Satan would make blatantly obvious that I lacked, I began to become aware of the feelings comparison was stirring up inside of me. One moment of comparing myself to another led to hundreds of moments of feeling inadequate, unlovable, and isolated. But, thanks to my good good Father, I began to notice. I became aware of every instance in which I found myself comparing myself to someone else, and a flood of the verses I have grown up hearing and studying came to my mind. Love does not envy. I’m made in His image. There are different parts to the body of Christ and none is more important than the other. God sees me. God is all I need. All of these truths restored my identity and took my focus off of others and onto God. You can’tme the Bible isn’t alive and active! God shone a spotlight on the problem that had been there all along, steeling my peace and robbing me of my contentment, right in His perfect timing. How good is our God!?!! He helped me notice my sin, and He out of it. He gave me His word to combat the lies I was believing and replaced them with truth about my identity as his child, and that gives me peace! He answered my prayer. Did the answer come how I was expecting? Not at all. Did I enjoy struggling with comparison? What do you think. But would I have it any other way? No way. Thankfully, the way God answers prayers isn’t up to me. Thank you for sharing your testimony, Bella! It’s beautiful. And thank you for providing a comment section where I can process what God has been doing in my life ? Keep roaring for Jesus!

  50. Sarah Schumacher

    Wow. Thank you so much for sharing this Bella. Your roar is no small thing. You are inspiring people all over the world. I wish I could say I had the faith that you do when I was your age. Even though I was lost and had no idea what a relationship with Jesus really looked like in my teens, God wastes nothing. All my hardships are being redeemed, as I lean into the One who makes beauty from ashes. You are a treasure, a beautiful girl, inside and out.

  51. Regena

    You inspire and encourage me Bella. Thank you so much for this lesson. I’ve compared myself a lot, and I get compared to some of my friends too (not always in a bad way, but kinda like what you said “you look so much like…” ) and so I’ve been trying to learn to be myself and not compare.