by Emma Gilmer | Aug 9, 2022 | Life Advice, Relationships, Wisdom |
For 9 months my fiancè and I planned one day, the day came and went. People told me leading up:
“you’ll be sad when it’s over”
“you won’t know what to do with yourself when you’re wedding is over”
“it goes by so fast, you’ll miss it”
But none of that was my experience…I was so passionate about using our engagement season to continue to bring us to the feet of Jesus humbly and have Him prepare us to become one. That can be really difficult because of all the questions coming your way all the time. I understand, you are the only one who knows every detail about your wedding day. I know that can be overwhelming, but try your best to find your purpose in the season and keep that at the front of your mind.
Our purpose leading up to our day was:
“we are preparing more for our marriage than our wedding”
The Lord has developed this huge heart of passion in me to share with you how easy it is to get sucked into wedding planning and forgetting about the reason you’re getting married. That is why I am here, I am excited to share with you ways to soak in your engagement season and plan your dream day intentionally.
My first piece of advice is; Don’t do it because others did it, do it because you WANT to.
There was a friend of mine who was about to order a 3-tier cake that was more money than she wanted to pay. I asked her if she was excited for it and she explained, “I am only doing it because I feel like it’s the ‘wedding’ thing to do.”
I stopped her in that moment and encouraged her that it is THEIR day, and if you two don’t want to do it, then they shouldn’t.
Details of the day are so beautiful, but when you and your fiancè’s hearts are the driving force behind your decisions, it will make your day so special.
*fun tip*
Make it a date night for you and your fiancè to try a bunch of different deserts and pick your favorite for your wedding day.
It doesn’t have to be a cake! It can be a big cookie, cheese cake, cupcake, donuts ANYTHING!!
My second piece of advice would be to Remember Your Mission.
A marriage is two people who are on a mission coming together as one.
“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh.” (Mark 10:7-8)
It is SO easy to get consumed during your engagement season with wedding planning, but this season is so beautiful to begin to align your mission. I really believe that your single season is so important to understand your mission and who you’re living for. When you get engaged it’s your opportunity to share with your person how you’re going to go forward into marriage with your like-minded mission at hand.
Join groups, serve together, be on mission.
It is easy to fall into wedding planning every time you are together, but prioritize your quality time as preparation time. The decorations, venues, dresses, and colors will all come together but bigger doesn’t mean better if it means sacrificing time to build your relationship.
*Preparation Tip* Grab an empty Journal, Polaroid, and a pen. Take time as a couple and write down christian married couples you look up to, reach out to those couples and ask to get dinner/coffee with them. When you are with them, ask them for their best piece of marriage advice, have them write it down, take their picture and add it to their page.
Then you have a book to look back on full of advice from those you look up to!
My last reminder for you to hold tight to is that The finish line isn’t the wedding ending, it’s the starting line of your lives together.
The reality is, you wake up the day after your wedding looking at what’s important.
It’s not the cake, flowers, dresses, or table decorations.
It’s that for your whole life, God was preparing you to wake up to someone who is deciding to spend their whole life loving you.
The truth is, the devil hates marriage. He is going to do his best to distract you from preparing for your marriage. He is going to fixate your eyes on the things of the world.
Keep your eyes fixated on the beautiful celebration that is your upcoming marriage.
Congratulations friend!!
My DMs are always open!!!
Emma Gilmer is an LO Ambassador from Minnesota who is passionate about helping women find freedom from sins that tie them down. She is newly married and loves sharing her life on Instagram and TikTok!
Keep up with Emma on Instagram @emm.gilmer
by Hope Harris | Aug 4, 2022 | Life Advice, Wisdom
There was a large group of people in the corner of a car dealership. Normally when you see a crowd you know something really interesting is going down. Naturally, I had to go check it out.
After a few minutes of observation, it was clear that ten people had car keys in their hand. Supposedly these ten were selected from a raffle drawing. One person had keys that would start the brand-new white SUV that everyone was surrounding.
The crowd watched as one person after the other sat down inside the push-to-start car to see if their key would start it up. The suspense was real. We were down to the eighth person. They sat in the seat and the car didn’t start.
Now on to the ninth. The math was pretty simple. If it didn’t start for this person, we knew the winner would be the tenth.
The ninth person hopped in the driver’s seat. The car didn’t start. The tenth person celebrated. The camera crew started asking her about her job and how she would use the car she just won.
Just for good measure and a fun photo op, she sat in what she thought was her brand-new car. She went to start the car up and nothing happened.
The “winner’s” keys didn’t work. The crowd was shocked. A few whispers that were easy to overhear said, “What in the world is going on? All ten people went. How did this happen? Who won?”
The other nine had a glimpse of hope again. Who would it be?
We watched five people all hop in and hop out when it was confirmed that it wasn’t their new rig. The sixth person got in to find out that he was the winner. His daughter and wife started crying tears of joy and jumped up and down in a group hug. Apparently, he had forgotten to press the break as he pushed the start button the first time.
I can only imagine the shock, joy, and excitement he was experiencing after already counting the opportunity as a lose. I can also only imagine the disappointment that the lady was experiencing after thinking the car was hers.
This got me thinking: What if we lived like we had the key to an everlasting Kingdom that God created for us?
As we get to know God, we learn that we hold the key to the Kingdom through our confession that Jesus is the Son of God. (Matthew 16:16-19) Isn’t that worth bouncing around with joy and excitement?
This key is unlike any other. We didn’t get selected because we bought a raffle ticket. It is not limited to one individual like that of this story. It was made possible because of the One who came to live on this Earth and die for every single one of us – Jesus, the Son of God.
Talk about the ultimate unexpected gift. He already paid the price for us. God cares about you so much that He cultivated a way for us to spend eternal life with Him. Can we take a minute or two to jump up and down and celebrate that today?
This key can be shared and given to those that we encounter in our everyday. Are you up for a challenge?
Friend, you hold the key that comes with the Good News. You’re positioned exactly where you’re supposed to be to “duplicate” and share this key.
Here’s a verse that sheds some light on what God calls us to in our everyday: “But you are the ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be holy people, God’s instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you–from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted.” 1 Peter 2:9-10 MSG
Your assignment is important. It is literally life-changing. Guess what? You don’t have to do this work alone.
God invites us to partner with Him in our everyday: “Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It’s God’s gift from start to finish! We don’t play the major role. If we did, we’d probably go around bragging that we’d done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.” Ephesians 2:7-10 MSG
Lean into where you are today. Focus on sharing your “key” with one person. Seek Jesus and ask Him to give you opportunities in your day to shine your light. Be present and alert because He is with you in this important role you get to partner with Him on daily. Smile and celebrate.
You have the key to the Kingdom that is everlasting with the One who delights in you, friend!
Hope Reagan Harris is a wife, dog mom, encourager, iced vanilla latte drinker, first-time author, and most importantly a Jesus seeker. If you were having a coffee chat with her today, she would want you to leave believing that you are seen, known, and loved more than you could ever imagine by Jesus. Become sister friends with her today @hopereaganharris on Instagram!
by Alice Matagora | Aug 2, 2022 | Homepage, Life Advice
My husband, RJ, and I were deeply motivated to care for the ethnic minority students in our ministry and to make our ministry feel more welcoming for everyone. We love these students deeply, and we were grieved to hear how they were hurting. Of course we’d want to make changes to serve them!
But when we began to do so, I was surprised by some internal resistance that rose up within me.
It would be easier to just keep things the same.
What will the majority of those in our ministry think about these changes?
Do I have the time to learn new songs and styles of playing the guitar?
What if my guitar skills aren’t good enough?
Though we may recognize that disciplemaking is a calling from God, that it’s a good thing, and that we should be doing it—and though we may be highly motivated to do so—we may encounter some internal opposition that keeps us from making the changes we want to make.
A recent discipleship study by the Barna Group provides some insight into the most common challenges and barriers to overcome in disciplemaking. According to their research, some themes emerge from these challenges and barriers to disciplemaking. We can break them down into four categories:
- A lack of resourcing (i.e., wanting to learn from someone how to do it well and not having the right materials)
- Prioritizing disciplemaking among other responsibilities
- Not wanting to “make it weird” (i.e., finding ways to keep it engaging over time and feeling like your beliefs would be imposed on someone else)
- Lack of confidence in disciplemaking
Can you relate to any of these challenges? The good news is that you’re not alone—and you have what it takes to conquer every one of these challenges. Challenges can feel daunting in the abstract, but when we take a closer look at them, more often than not we can find a way through.
LACK OF RESOURCING
Do you want someone to teach you how to disciple well? Don’t just find someone to teach you, find someone to disciple you. Learn from experiencing it firsthand. Don’t get me wrong. Resources on disciplemaking can be incredibly helpful, and they’re an excellent starting point for gaining knowledge, learning techniques, and finding inspiration. (Please keep reading this book!) But you’ll learn what disciplemaking actually looks like if you’re being discipled.
Ask your pastor, your discipler or mentor, or someone whose walk with Jesus you admire for resources that have been helpful to them in their disciplemaking.
PRIORITIZING DISCIPLEMAKING AMONG OTHER RESPONSIBILITIES
If we’re to restore disciplemaking as a priority in the Christian life, we must start with the conviction that it is a calling not just for pastors and those in full-time ministry but for all disciples of Jesus. We must talk about disciplemaking from the pulpit, within our church communities, in our friendships, and in our discipling relationships. Disciplemaking must be a regular part of our conversations about what it means to live the Christian life with others.
And then we must make an honest assessment of our lives: Is what I am giving my time to reflective of what is most important in the kingdom of God? Are my life and priorities truly aligned with God’s? And if God led someone who wanted to be discipled into my life, does my pace of life provide enough space to do so? What would it cost me to obey Jesus’ calling in this way?
NOT WANTING TO “MAKE IT WEIRD”
Being in authentic, life-giving relationships means being vulnerable with others. It means allowing all of yourself to be seen for who you are—the good, the bad, and the ugly—and experiencing the deep connection that comes from being accepted just as you are. Transformative relationships happen when we allow another person close enough for us to risk being hurt or rejected, and to risk making things weird.
But our instinct is to hold back from being truly vulnerable in relationships. We have been in hiding ever since Adam and Eve hid from God in the Garden. We have hidden our sin, our longings, our truest identities for fear of being rejected. We have become fearful of being truly known.
Jesus changed all of that, allowing himself to experience the vulnerability of being human—and not just the physical conditions of birth, hunger, thirst, and pain, but the vulnerability of relationship. He gave all of himself only to be rejected, entrusted himself to dear companions only to be betrayed, spoke the reality of the kingdom of God only to be misunderstood.
Jesus risked vulnerability because of the joy set before him—that some might come to know him, follow him, and love him back.
When Jesus died on the cross, our sin, shame, and powerlessness were nailed there as well. In him, we can be free from the fear of rejection or condemnation. We can present ourselves freely before others and even do some pretty awkward (at least to us) things in Jesus’ name, knowing that our confidence, identity, and worth are securely held in God’s good hands.
Part of what keeps us from disciplemaking is the fear of imposing our beliefs on others—and if we’re honest, we may even be afraid that talking about Jesus is going to make things weird.
To be in a relationship with anyone is to accept the reality that things may feel weird and vulnerable at times—and this reality only intensifies as we risk putting ourselves and our beliefs out there. But we have to remember: there are people around us who want to learn about Jesus and Christianity. Who will tell them? Who will help them grow? If anything is worth putting yourself out there for, it’s that some may come to know and love Jesus and be transformed by his amazing grace.
LACK OF CONFIDENCE IN DISCIPLEMAKING
Of the reasons American Christians aren’t interested in disciplemaking, most are a result of a lack of confidence: What makes you so sure I can do this?
I often feel this way. What can I possibly offer to someone else? I’m just a mom who throws sticks and rocks in the pond with my son. There has to be someone more qualified and equipped than I am!
Some giants of faith in the Bible struggled with confidence as well. But in the Scriptures, we get to see the amazing things that can happen when someone overcomes their lack of confidence to partner with God in his bigger story—like in the story of Moses.
Moses was born a Hebrew slave in Egypt but became royalty when Pharoah’s daughter took him in as her own son, and Moses lived separated from the people of Israel.
Later in his life, Moses made a fateful choice: taking justice into his own hands, he killed an Egyptian who was harming one of his fellow Hebrews. When word reached Pharaoh, Moses fled for his life and spent the next forty years as a shepherd in the desert.
That brings us to the incredible words in Exodus 2:23-25 (NLT):
Years passed, and the king of Egypt died. But the Israelites continued to groan under their burden of slavery. They cried out for help, and their cry rose up to God. God heard their groaning, and he remembered his covenant promise to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He looked down on the people of Israel and knew it was time to act.
So now what?
God called Moses to lead his people out of captivity. All two-plus million of them.
That’s no small task!
When Moses encountered God in the desert, he asked some questions familiar to any of us who have struggled with confidence.
First, he asked God, “Who am I to do this?” God assured Moses that he would be with him the whole way (Exodus 3:11-12).
Then Moses asked, “What do I say? What do I do?” and God told him to gather the elders of Israel and lay out an entire plan that God would give him to share with the people of Israel, including what would happen when Pharaoh refused to let the people of Israel go (verses 13-18).
When Moses responded, “What if they don’t believe me?” God gave him a few miraculous signs to perform for the people of Israel to establish his credibility as the deliverer God had sent (4:1-9).
Moses responded, “I’m not eloquent! I don’t speak well!” and God assured Moses that he would give him the words to speak (verses 10-12).
Finally, in Exodus 4:13 (NLT), Moses said, “Lord, please! Send anyone else.”
Whew. How many times have I asked God a billion questions before finally getting to the heart of the issue: I can’t do it. Please don’t make me do it! Please send someone else!
What I love—and what makes me squirm—is that God didn’t give Moses an out. He said, “You’re doing it!” But he also met Moses where he was, graciously allowing Aaron to come alongside and bolster Moses’ shaky confidence. And then God assured Moses of his continued presence.
As Moses trusted God and stepped forward into his calling, he began to move from a lack of confidence in himself to an unwavering confidence in God. Moses started out his ministry by speaking to the people through Aaron, but by the end, he spoke to the people of Israel directly. And as Moses lived in obedience to God, he cultivated a deep friendship and intimate companionship with God (Exodus 33:11) that he would not have experienced otherwise.
As you think about God’s calling to make disciples who make disciples, can you relate to Moses? Lord, who am I to do this? What can I offer? I know I do. When I find myself lacking in confidence, what helps me is the assurance of God’s presence, his Holy Spirit within me, helping me do something I can’t even imagine as I step forward in obedience. Even when I lack confidence, I experience his companionship and friendship along the way, with more than enough of his grace to cover every success and every stumble.
Adapted from How to Save the World: Disciplemaking Made Simple by Alice Matagora. Copyright © 2022. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
Alice Matagora is the Leader Development Initiatives Program Coordinator for The Navigators and serves with The Navigators Collegiate ministry at the University of California at Irvine. She lives in California with her husband and children.
by Lauren Ruark | Jul 28, 2022 | Life Advice, Testimonies
Years ago, a lot of the things that were happening in my life that I cared about happened at night. Partying, going out, sneaking around, late night conversations. All of my desires were based on whatever I thought was fun and that became the center of my lifestyle. But those same things also brought me the most anxiety. I was living significant parts of my life literally in the darkness and my soul was in the dark as a result. Every other area of my life felt it too, whether I admitted it or not. I genuinely was sold on everything that culture and media told me – what I should do with my time, what I should look like, what it meant to be successful based on what others thought about me. I saw anything that went against that as boring and lame. I was willing to give up anything having to do with my faith to experience this way of life that I was convinced was better.
“For you were formerly darkness, but now you are Light in the Lord; walk as children of Light” (Ephesians 5:8)
The freedom, joy, and lightness that I feel now, even when I’m walking through harder seasons, can only be explained by the Holy Spirit in me. The only way to describe my life is that it has been completely transformed by Jesus and it will forever be my greatest joy to talk about who He is.
“You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others.” (Matthew 5:14-16)
You may love God or you may not really know who God is. If that’s you, just know that He loves you and He’s pursuing you, you can know that just by the fact that you’re reading this article. Years ago, He sent His son to die in our place as the ultimate sacrifice for the brokenness that’s so present in our world and so opposite of how He intended it to be when he created it. He lived radically and counter-culturally, not by saying all of the right things and being church-y. But by being bold, listening well, loving the very least of these on earth, not choosing to be around the most put together. And most importantly, when he left his time here on earth, He was raised from the dead and promised that one day we’ll get to live with Him and there will be a whole new earth that is absolutely perfect just as he originally designed it to be. (Romans 5:8)
So this life isn’t it. There is so much more purpose than just our 24 hour routines and habits that make up our lives. Actually letting that sink in is like letting light flood in.
CS Lewis said, “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.
If you feel stuck between knowing there has to be more, yet constantly wanting to give into your desires, and not knowing which is the way to actual full, abundant life, this is for you. Here are some things that I’ve learned:
1. Pray for changed desires.
“I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” (John 10:10)
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)
In college, I prayed consistently and specifically for changed desires, that I would actually desire whatever was true and good. He changed my desires and I watched my relationships deepen and change with them. The peace I felt translated to all of the other areas of my life. My definition of fun changed. Experiencing an unwavering security and having deep relationships was fun. Having a purpose that was so much bigger than myself was fun. I think it’s funny that now the most significant and meaningful parts of my life happen literally in the light— yes I still love doing fun things at night obviously—but the parts that I care most about happen in the daylight. Mountain weekends, long walks with my husband AJ, dinners with my best friends, leading high school ministry on Mondays after work, painting in my art studio down the street, helping my friend with her nonprofit that fulfills the dreams of youth who have aged out of the foster care system. The life I’m living on mission is just better in every way.
“but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. … Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” (John 4:14)
2. Become friends with people who life you up and challenge you and your faith.
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17)
These friendships changed my life. One of my best friends Sellers was the one who first told me that she had prayed for changed desires and saw that transform her life. I never would have prayed that if I hadn’t have heard her talk about it. We are not meant to do life alone. When I was in high school I thought being a Christian meant sitting at home alone reading your bible while everyone else was out together having fun. But Jesus had 12 trusted friends he pretty much did everything with. Our friends are meant to grow with us, be honest with us, carry us through hard times, and in the same way we’re there for them. Making new friends can be uncomfortable, but keep showing up, keep initiating, keep going places where you know people who love Jesus will be. Life is not easy and we need each other.
3. Realizing our lives are not about ourselves.
“Worthy are you, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they existed and were created.” (Revelation 4:11)
I don’t want you to read this and hear me say, “this is what worked for me, this can work for you. Follow what I did” Because it is not about me. Hear me say that I am broken and impatient and an overcommitter and really need a savior because I fall short everyday of who I want to be. I’m not worth following but the God I follow IS worth it. He knows I mess up all the time and He’s not mad. He is perfect and forgiving and loving and powerful. The Bible is made up of His own words and it is full of stories about Him taking care of His people in crazy ways. We never have to feel alone or out of control. He is not distant. In college one time in a harder season I prayed out loud in my car with worship music playing, and I can’t describe it but I truly felt his presence with me. Even though life looked nothing the way I wanted it to at the time, I felt like I had this loving creator who made me and had a purpose for me and was closer than He ever had been before. And I knew I was going to be okay.
“The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” (John 1:5)
There is a lot of darkness in the world. But if Christ is in us we can have confidence that we’ve read the end of the book and the darkness does not overcome the light. Jesus says in John 8:12: “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”
Lauren Ruark is the artist and designer behind Lauren Fuhr Design Co. She loves high school ministry and any creative projects she can get her hands on. She shares her art with the hope of making others’ lives and homes more beautiful, but ultimately pointing them to the true source of beautiful, full life that is in Jesus. She loves being outside and lives live to the full with her husband, AJ, and their dog, Wilson.
by Anna Grace Birley | Jul 26, 2022 | Life Advice, Relationships
“Let the redeemed of the Lord tell their story” Psalm 107:2
Arrival. In my pride I walked into this new season of post-grad feeling some false sense of arrival. I have walked in faith and obedience to the Lord for the past four years. I landed a job where I can trace it to my first step of obedience the Lord called me to four years ago. I came into a new city, a new job, and a new community asking the Lord for humility and meekness. Asking the Lord for good questions to ask people, the strength to live presently, and to always have the desire to continue to learn and heed wisdom. But I felt a sense that I had ‘arrived’ or ‘mastered’ what it looked like to walk in obedience to the Lord. This kind of thinking only hindered me from growing in my walk with the Lord. We will never ‘arrive’ to some particular level of sanctification with the Lord which is honestly such a beautiful space to live in. As someone who really enjoys learning something new, I enjoy this about walking in step daily with Him. On the other hand, I am someone who puts a lot of pressure on themselves, so I can get into an unhealthy and unbiblical mindset of, “Okay let’s check this sin off the list and work on nixing the next one out of my life. & okay observing a sabbath? Got it. Walking in a humble & joyful dependence and obedience to God? I have tasted and seen it is good, so I don’t need to ‘work on that’ in this new season.”
I arrived to Louisiana and something beautiful that Satan had turned into something to haunt me returned. Baptism and I have had a four year long journey. I was baptized when I was thirteen, fully knowing I was saved by the blood of Jesus and that I was publicly declaring this to my church congregation. But it wasn’t until I was nineteen and a freshman at Liberty University when Jesus became my Savior and the Lord of my life. I handed over control to Him. I handed over my own desires and plans. This life isn’t our own and Jesus’ ways are always higher. I learned it was obvious 1 John 5:3 was spot on: obedience isn’t burdensome. And it isn’t because my obedience ended in a positive outcome every time, but it is because God was with me the whole time and He is the promise we need. I learned where there is surrender there is the fullness of His promise of freedom and joy.
The church I attended for four years in Virginia was very vocal about surrendering the fear of man when it came to baptism. I remember the first month being there and seeing people getting baptized & thinking to myself, “There is something different in my life about following Jesus. Maybe I should get rebaptized.” I thought about it more and concluded for myself that it wasn’t necessary. I knew what I was doing when I was thirteen; it was enough. And for four years I had the same conversation with myself which always ended in frustration. Baptism became wrapped up in shame, fear of man, and confusion.
There were so many things that held me back from baptism. I kept ‘coming to a peace’ about not doing it when in reality, I was ashamed. I thought if I got up in front of my church after being some kind of “leader” and got baptized everyone would think I was fake and I had just accepted Jesus. Of course, this would not have been the case for them to think this. Another reason I experienced the four year wrestle was checking my motivation of getting in the water to get baptized. I didn’t want it to be out of fear. I was fearful of walking in disobedience, so if I were to get in there it would not be out of a joyful surrender but it would be, “OK let’s get this over with so that way God can use me.” But as the title of this blog spoils the story, I fully realized baptism isn’t about me. It’s not about justifying who I am to my community. It’s about publicly proclaiming the best news that has ever been told. It’s about Jesus & I had made it about me.
During the four year wrestle I opened up fully to three different people, trusted people. All three pointed me to Him as I trusted they would and I kept ‘coming to a peace’ to not go through with it. But every time I thought I had put it to bed it would come back. Something beautiful the Lord intended for us, the enemy turned into a haunting of some sort. I know that sounds weird, but that’s how it felt. When it would return it would turn my cherished and protected time with Him in the mornings distant and bitter. It would make me sad, discouraged, and question over and over if I knew the Lord’s voice. One of the friends I turned to about all this said that I did know His voice. She said it was our inheritance that as a believer we get to hear His voice as we pray with authority given by Him. When you surrender and let go of the things in life you love more than Him or you think about more than Him [that’s an idol, friend] you are able to experience the fullness of the promise of Who God is. His abundance, His goodness, His faithfulness, His daily bread. Baptism had turned into an idol, and it wasn’t good.
A couple weeks before I moved to LA I was on my way to style a friend of mine and her husband’s closets. The idea of baptism came back in a rush, and I became discouraged. The Holy Spirit prompted me to stop talking to my God about my problems and start talking to my enemy about my God. I prayed with authority that in Jesus’ name Satan no longer had a hold on something so beautiful and sacred. I immediately felt better, texted my community, & I knew if it came back, which I doubted it would, I knew what to do. I went to church the next morning and held it loosely before the Lord telling Him I would do it if He wanted me to, and I didn’t feel a prompting to get baptized. I moved to LA and the third day I’m there it hits me like a ton of bricks and now I’m angry. My whole life was new and different. The only thing that didn’t change was my God and now? My parents were gone, the people I had done life with were gone, I wasn’t fully seen or known by anyone in the state, and the baptism issue was back? It was tough because I knew if He asked me to do it I would be mad at myself for not obeying four years ago, so my people could be there for such a joyous occasion. But God covers all our bases y’all. I’ll get there.
I called a friend I had kept the whole, detailed story from on purpose because I knew what her answer would be: get up and get baptized – shoutout to her! I told her the entire story and she met me with such clarity, edification, and truth all wrapped up in one reply: “I am not the voice of the Lord, but I know for a fact that the enemy would never ever prompt you to get baptized. Baptism is the obedient step and I think the Lord is calling you to it, and Anna Grace it is such a joyous thing. Getting in the pool to get baptized to fight for your intimacy with the Lord is not a shameful or sinful thing. That’s an incredible reason to get in that pool and declare before a brand-new set of believers in your life that this is where you stand and this is Who you are committed to. I wish I could be there. I wish your people could be there who have walked with you for the past four years in your obedience to the Lord.” I broke down weeping and replied, “This has been so hard. It didn’t need to be this hard. I need to stop looking back on the past four years and punching myself in the face for not being obedient. It’s keeping me from obedience. I need to do this ASAP & I don’t care what people think anymore.”
I knelt before my Father the next morning and was filled with a feeling that when, not if, I went through with the baptism, would it nix the past four years that I knew I had walked with the Lord in. I knew I had devoted my life to Him. Would all of that go out the window? Literally a question that went through my head was, “Have I been living a lie because I haven’t been baptized since Jesus became the Lord of my life?” I heard Him so clearly say in my room, “This is you simply taking an obedient step with me today. This is you simply taking one step closer to your relationship with me today.” Why would I say no to that? I also know this was the Lord because for the past season He has taught me so much of what it looks like to daily trust in Him [Galatians 5:16]. He has taught me that He is a daily God, holding my hand as I walk step by step with His Word as a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. This sounded like my God.
It was my first Monday on the job, my fourth day of my literal first full time job, and as we met for our weekly meeting I shared with my team for accountability and celebration purposes that I needed to get rebaptized. The joy that came over the team was unmatched. They asked if I wanted to wait to do it at the church or do it sooner, and I said I wanted to do it ASAP. So the plan was made that after work we would drive to a swimming pool and do it there. On a Monday. With a team of women I had met less than a week ago who were way more than willing to cheer me on. I called my parents and grandmother at lunch prefacing my story with, “I hope you meet this with grace.” I had let them into my story before I moved to LA, and I felt ashamed that I was finally going through with it without them there. They were thrilled and asked for a video.
After work we gathered and a teammate brought me a change of clothes. They all asked me to share my testimony. It was the most messy, under prepared, unplanned “speech” I had ever given. I was a Communication major so this was tough to swallow, but it was another moment to exercise the muscle of selflessness. God is in every single detail haha! Baptism wasn’t about me. It was about my God. To share your entire story with a team of godly women you look up to but had just met was scary. But it wasn’t scary because the really big part of my story was that it wasn’t my story. It was His. Baptism is all about Him. And what He did for me. What did He do? He took on all my sin so I could live life in a broken world free and live eternally with Him in heaven. He also gave me the strength to kick Satan in the face. I was over the shame, I was over the fear of man, and I didn’t care what these women thought about my delayed obedience or about the legitimacy of my walk with my God because I knew that obedience isn’t burdensome. I knew that I was so over being bogged down by this one thing.
One of the women there after I had shared my story told me that she knows a lot of people that think that if they are baptized then everything in the past that had to do with them and Jesus was for nothing, but she ensured me that this was me taking one step closer today with the Lord. I was floored as I shared with the group that’s exactly what God had told me that morning. It was such a full circle moment for me because that was one of the biggest things that scared me about going through with this.
I genuinely thought that God had saturated my whole entire life – that he had every single key to my heart. But he didn’t. I held tightly onto the key for baptism’s door. And so with faith I handed him the key and I was baptized in front of my team. The men and women that had grown me up in my faith the past four years were not there. But I knew this was exactly what God wanted me to do.
After I was baptized I went home and I made dinner. I texted my grandparents, my parents, and my girls the video and I went to bed. I do feel a peace today that that was the obedient step. I feel relieved actually. I write this without shaming myself: but if Jesus did this himself, “Jesus replied, ‘Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness.’ Then John consented. As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water. At that moment heaven was opened, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and alighting on him. And a voice from heaven said, ‘This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased’” (New International Version, Matthew 3:15-17). So why did I delay?
I wanted to give you a lot of this detail because the enemy is super personal. But Jesus holds the authority and Jesus holds the truth and Jesus holds the victory. I know in my spirit that somebody needed to hear my story because it is really specific, but I don’t think it’s rare. Like I mentioned before my church in Virginia talked nonstop about the fear of man as it pertains to baptism. But I still refused to let God into that. In that refusal I wrestled with confusion, shame, and fear of man. But I thought that it was OK. I write this today for the purposes of kicking Satan in the face, because he does not have a hold on my relationship with my God. He does not have a hold on my image. He does not have a hold on my reputation. This life is but a mist [James 4:14]. Who am I to think that I need to preserve some type of image to my community? The only true thing that I must preserve is the gospel of Jesus Christ because that is the sustenance. That is the good stuff. That is what is truly healing and truly meaningful.
Remember when I mentioned God covered all my bases? I have shared my story with only a few people so far but every time I share it, the joy of the Lord is my strength. & my people are not disappointed in my delay, but they are thrilled with my day by day seeking His face. Also every time I write ‘came to a peace’ I write it in quotes because today I do not understand what that peace was. It was clear I was supposed to be baptized but it was a wrestle. I still am choosing to share that detail with y’all because I don’t believe we deserve privy to each and every detail in how God works. I may never know what the ‘peace’ was to not go through with baptism but the point is that I have chosen to not sit and dwell on it. To punch myself in the face for it. To be angry with God about it. I am not looking backward. To quote one of my favorite songs right now, “I’m not who I was. I’m who you’re making me” (Grace by Mosaic MSC). Every day I want Him to make me look more like Him. Who I was when I was fully surrendered to Jesus three months ago, three years ago, or three days ago is not who I am today. I am who He is making me to be daily.
Arrival. It’s a myth; a tactic from the enemy to blindside you. Abiding. That’s the truth. That’s the good stuff.
AG is a member of Team LO and a recent grad of Liberty University. She is a massive Atlanta Braves fan [her hometown ayo!], never says no to an estate sale, & loves to style her friends outfits from their own closets.
by Sarah Bross | Jul 21, 2022 | Life Advice, Relationships
Dear single girl,
Let’s talk about #couplegoals. This idea of the cutest love stories. The love of your life and you finally meet him and he’s everything – you get along, you make each other laugh, you have the same favorite restaurant and the same favorite hobbies and he likes dogs just as much as you do! You can’t wait for a lifetime of ice cream dates and movie nights and exploring new places and starting a family and serving God with the man of your dreams.
This is my story, with my husband, Zack. I met the guy who just made me SO happy, who I felt like I could be fully myself around, who I have so much fun with. We met in high school, we take cute-sy photos and put them on instagram, and sometimes people comment #couplegoals.
You’ll find that person someday, too. But in the meantime, let’s break down #couplegoals. I always laugh when I see someone comment something like this on one of our photos. One time one of our photos even got used in a viral #couplegoals tiktok. But here’s the facts: we are not perfect, at all.
Recently I received a message from a college girl asking for advice in relationships, saying she looks up to Zack and I’s relationship and wants what we have, but has trouble trusting the timing of when she will find that person and was just feeling a little lost.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
Zack and I have a great marriage now, but it wasn’t always this easy. We grew up together. Like, since we were 16. That leaves a lot of room for growing and maturing and making mistakes and hurting each other along the way. Maybe people see us now and think “goals” but here’s the reality: every relationship on this side of heaven has flaws, pain, and messiness. We need Jesus in our lives, his grace, his forgiveness to be a model for us as we pursue great relationships on earth.
10 years with Zack has taught me this: Your relationship with your spouse/BF can never replace your relationship with God. Why? Because God loves you perfectly, and no matter how hard your spouse might try, they can’t.
“This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. He loves you with a perfect, reckless love that we as followers of Christ are called to emulate (“we also ought to love one another”) but we aren’t God, we aren’t perfect. We mess up.
It’s been the times that I put Zack in the number 1 position in my life that things have been off. Every time he did something that hurt my feelings the pain was deeper, every disagreement felt worse. Too much of my need for perfect love and acceptance was falling on an imperfect person. Friend, it isn’t good for you, and it’s unfair to put that pressure on someone else as well.
At one point, about 7 years in, I had to face my biggest fear: which was losing Zack. We hit a really rough patch in our relationship. There were lots of tears and lots of nights where I felt so alone, rejected, confused and heartbroken. I thought this was the man of my dreams. I thought he was who God had for me. We were best friends but now everything seemed to be falling apart. I had given 7 years of my life to this man and I wanted desperately with everything in me to be his wife one day, but the path he was on and our future was looking increasingly bleak.
This went on for a few months, and it was one of the most emotionally crushing few months I’ve ever experienced. I clung to God and prayed. I asked for him please please please to let me and Zack work things out. I asked him to bring Zack back to him. Nothing seemed to work. Was God ignoring my prayers? I thought he wanted me to be with Zack, but now he seemed so silent.
Here’s where the breakthrough came: A few months in, I surrendered. I said to God, “Lord I want this. Near as much as I want to breathe I want to be with Zack. But, God you are more important to me that he is. You love me more perfectly. My life is yours. If Zack isn’t who you have for me, I will walk away right now. I pray you give me the bravery to do so. I surrender this desire to you. I am done trying, I am just going to listen to you. Whatever you tell me to do, I will do it. I trust you to bring me into the life you have for me.”
Sometimes I think God wants to give us what we want, but he knows that first we need a lesson in who is our #1 and who is our #2.
God is your #1 and your spouse is your #2. When I surrendered this desire to God, I finally could live my day to day in freedom. I felt a peace wash over me because I didn’t have to strive and try to get what I wanted through my own power. I had a peace knowing that God was directing my steps, and as long as I followed him, I would be ok.
After I surrendered, Zack and I’s relationship started improving. The life he was leading started to change. He grew just as much as I did in this season, but in other ways. This season of hardship was preparing him to be a husband as much as it was preparing me to be a wife. I HAD to learn that lesson. God knew I couldn’t enter into marriage looking at Zack as my #1. It wasn’t fair to him to expect him to love me perfectly. Only God can do that.
In a season of singleness you might feel the same kind of desperation. The “why, God, why?!” the “all my friends are finding boyfriends, what is wrong with me?!” Friend, nothing is wrong with you! But what if God is trying to save you from the heartache that I experienced that comes with putting your boyfriend in the number one spot in your life. What if God is waiting for you to surrender that desire to him and let him be your number one. So that way he knows you’re ready.
Surrender is hard. But God loves you perfectly. He knows your desire for a spouse. He sees that. If you’re in a season of waiting, you have to know that his goodness is all over that. He knows that He needs to be your number 1 first before you meet that person for that relationship to be as good and sweet as possible.
So, single girls, the best thing you can do right now is seek your 1. Pursue God. Spend time in the word, try to grasp and wrap your mind around his perfect love (Ephesians 3:18). Pray for your future spouse. How sweet is it to think you are storing up prayers for them to benefit from in the future. This is the best way to love them before you know them. When God’s timing is right, you will meet them. And when you do, you will be right where you need to be with God to avoid the heartache that comes with placing them in the number 1 spot in your life.
You will be in the perfect place to seek your 1 with your 2. And that is #couplegoals.
Sarah Bross is a fashion + faith blogger from St. Louis, Missouri currently living in Long Island, New York with her husband, Zack. She loves seeking out the joyful parts of life, making things fun, watching sunsets, going on ice cream dates and finding adventure – even at Target. Say hi on instagram @sarahkbross
