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Locker Room Talk

by | Mar 21, 2018 | Life Advice, Relationships | 39 comments

You know the one scene in mean girls, when they are all in Regina’s bedroom and start saying all the worst things about themselves? I think the reason it is so funny is because it’s a little too true. What do you hear when you are in the locker room? One girl says, “oh my gosh my legs are huge…”, and then it is like a spiral effect one after another. “My face is so fat.” “I’m literally a giant.” A couple of weeks ago, as I was in the locker room, this same conversation came up and as the words, “my stomach is huge” came out of my mouth, I was convicted. What am I saying? Why am I saying this? So I started to think, what if in that moment I said, “I love my body.” What would have happened then? Girls would probably look at me funny, because yeah…you don’t hear that often and yeah…I’m no x-small. Girls, what if you said, “I love my body” and take it step further—what if you actually believed it!!

On this journey of finding body positivity, I’ve learned that we all need to enforce in girls these days is that what you speak upon yourself is what you are going to believe. If you are telling yourself you’re too heavy or that you need to look like that model on TV to be happy, you really are going to believe that—but what if you looked in the mirror and said, “you’re beautiful and exactly who God made you to be”. Do you think you would believe that? No? Okay, imagine this: you are packing for a friend’s house and you walk by the mirror and catch glimpse of your body. Here is when you make the decision. When that voice in your head says, “yikes you need to go on a diet!” You say, “uh, no” to that. You hold your head up and you say, “girl you are flawless and you do not need to be a size 0 to be the absolutely priceless girl that you ALREADY are.” This is what it is all about. My old bible teacher used to say, “Garbage in, garbage out.” Do not put garbage about yourself in your head. You can work-out all you want, but until you work on what your mind believes about yourself, there is absolutely no way you will be able to happily look in the mirror.

So that is what I’m here to tell you. You are more than body shaming. You are more than low self-esteem. You are more than your differences, and you better believe it. You are rare, and that is not something to be looked down on. That is something to be proud of. That is something to believe. There’re lots of different beliefs floating around, but I think this one is real, and this is something I want to be heard on. I want you to hear me when I say you are stronger than this tough tough battle. I want you to listen to me when I say you are better, and my goodness I want you to believe me when I say YOU ARE MORE.

I had lots of ideas about what I was going to write for this blog, but nothing hit me as hard as this. I know so many people talk about the issue of the lack of body positivity, but girls, maybe there is a reason for that. Maybe there’s something to it. I encourage you not to just read over these words. I encourage you to let them sink in and believe them. Guys, body positivity is really a confidence issue. Confidence doesn’t have to be a conceited thing. You can be confident in the most humble authentic way. It is all about what you believe about yourself though.

Remember to love your body, because it gets you places. It is one of the many things that makes you, you. This subject is tricky and in no way do I have it all together, but that is the thing, body positivity is not something you just wake up and have. Jenna Kutcher always says it is a daily decision you make, and that couldn’t be truer. It is a choice, so choose it. Choose to believe it. Don’t live trapped in the boundaries body shaming gives you. So, next time you are in the locker room and tempted to say something negative about your body, bite your tongue (figuratively, not literally).

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39 Comments

  1. Nora Andersen

    I love this!!!!

  2. Bethany Cooper

    I couldn’t have agreed more! I have always heard that to not be ashamed of your body because God is the one who gave it to you. My mom has always said God gives you things for a reason, be happy about your body, and LOVE YOURSELF just the way you are!
    On a side note, I just got your sister Sadie’s book Live Fearless: A Call to Power, Passion, and Purpose, let me tell you, that book is AMAZING! I am almost finished with it, I have come to realize so many truths about my life today. After naming all my fears, following along with the challenges she has in her book, I am becoming closer to God. I have always thought I was close to God but, to honest, there were a lot of things I was trying to hold in and God knew I was holding them in. The other day, reading a page in the book, I just felt the need to pray, so I did. My day went so much better that day! Thank you girls for inspiring me to believe more in God and worship him better than ever! – Bethany

  3. Dr.md.babul Hossain

    Yes I believe God Jesus my love and life and all everything. I want make God Jesus name capture and God Jesus believers family relationship for life time. I am seriously agree ! Amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen amen

  4. Lilly Cobb

    This is seriously just what I needed to hear right now! I’ve constantly heard it said that we are daughters of Christ so we should view ourselves as such, but it’s a daily struggle for me to believe in this world that is constantly telling me otherwise. I literally have to tell myself "you are BEAUTIFUL and LOVED". What a blessing.

  5. Abigail Huisingh

    Everyone is beautiful in their own unique way. You are worth more they ANY number on a scale! God loves you for YOU!!!

  6. Madison Graham

    I love this, and I needed this. Thankyou.

  7. Evelyn Statham

    So amazing!!!!!! You are absolutely right!!!?

  8. Avanlé Ribeiro

    Wow this made me cry??I’ve recently been battling this subject and unfortunately not winning. So thankful for the truth you weren’t afraid to spread, and is so badly needed to heard!

  9. MaryEmma Dewey

    Thanks so much? I’m happy with who I am but I know that lots of people struggle with this.

  10. Sarah Edwards

    46 yrs old and still so true! I’m talking about this to my girls at church 3rd-6th grade. I have to tell myself that I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
    Thank you

  11. Brianna Moss

    Bella that is so good. You have no idea how much you have just inspired me.❤ (Also, it would mean the world to me if everyone could check out my Blog please. It’s https://brimoss2003.wixsite.com/website I’ve started it last month)

  12. Mere Tabor

    Absolutely love & needed this reminder!!! You are wise beyond your years girl. Never change!

  13. London Myers

    Romans 9:20-21 (Msg), goes perfectly with this message! It states, "Who in the world do you think you are to second-guess God? Do you for one moment suppose any of us knows enough to call God into question? Clay doesn’t talk back to the fingers that mold it, saying, ‘Why did you shape me like this?’ Isn’t it obvious that a potter has a perfect right to shape one lump of clay into a vase for holding flowers and another into a pot for cooking beans?". God obviously loves variety, (Don’t believe me, just look around!), and has shaped us perfectly according to His purpose for us! 🙂

  14. Faith Jones

    Thank you so much Bella?this is really encouraging,this helped and inspired me ALOT, I have struggled with this for a while and this really helped, so thank you again.

  15. Belle Mitchell

    This was so good!!!

  16. Kennedy King

    This is truly inspiring words i am a 14 year old girl and i definitely hear all the things that i say about myself in the mirror. Or cry myself not like my body, but this really did sink in for me and I am thinkful that you know how to handle this kind of stuff. I wish i could just read this to all of the girls in my school i think it would just spread to so many people and the world would change just a little, but for the better!! THANK YOU so much Bella:)

  17. Avery Johnston

    I love this! So encouraging, something we all need to hear and start saying about ourselves! Thank you Bella for sharing!

  18. Rachel Smith

    bella you are a true light in this world and i loved this message some much because it’s so real. ?

  19. Lily Brister

    this is so good Bella. you are inspiring me in so many ways. thank you for being such a godly role model for me.

  20. Carley Scott

    This is so true and real!!! It’s sad to hear how easy it is to fall under it but wih Gods awesome strength we have been given we CAN choose to be stronger than the lies society tells us!!!! Amen to this!!!!!?

  21. Gloriana Krasnodemsky

    So true!! You have no idea how inspiring and encouraging you are!!? I always want to be skinnier but I realize that god mad me the way I am in his own image and for that I am priceless and so is every other girl in the world. Thankyou!

  22. sydney hill

    this is incredible! you have such a beautiful heart, thank you for this amazing message?

  23. katie Ragsdale

    Awesome

  24. katie Ragsdale

    Amazing wisdom from a beautiful young woman!

  25. ashley christopher

    This was JUST what I needed to hear today!! As I was looking for swimsuits online, I felt very disappointed to hear that all the models were wearing a size XS or S..which is NOT the norm. Thank you, Bella…

  26. Mariana Fredette

    I love you

  27. Rachel Sutton

    I was literally just looking at pictures of myself from an event and almost cried at how big and ugly I looked. This was EXACTLY what I needed to hear, EXACTLY today. thank you Bella. You are such a light

  28. Chelsea Accipiter

    This post literally is so true not just for the locker room, but for all aspects of life! Thank you for choosing to write this post!

  29. Cameron Coleman

    Preach!!!!

  30. halia mauck

    this is exactly what i needed to hear exactly today!! my family and i are going to the beach this weekend for spring break, and i often feel uncomfortable in my bathing suit because i’m not the skinniest person. but thank you for this, bella!! i know that God made me that way he wants me to be, and that is an amazing reminder for me!!!???

  31. Megan Trauch

    Thank you so much for sharing what God put in your heart. I needed this more than you could know ?

  32. Emily Riggs

    Thank you for this bit of wisdom and encouragement! Body positivity is such a relevant topic, and permeates every area of life–from a sports locker room, to a group of best friends saying "guys, we should start going to the gym", to sorority houses where sisters say "oh my gosh, my legs are so huge", to the local gym where girls comment saying "I wish I looked like her". Thank you for speaking truth into the matter! For scriptural truth check out Psalm 139:14, Proverbs 3:18, and Proverbs 31:30.

    • Madison W

      Amen!

  33. Tirzah Wittenberg

    Wow! This is perfect timing for me! I have been pretty good with body positivity over the winter, but as summer has gotten closer, I have recently started a negative thought cycle. Literally, right before I read this, I trying to think of ways I could thin my thighs and butt. I read it and I was like, "Wow God!" He literally just stopped me in my tracks and convicted me of my destructive mental path before I got hurt.
    Thank you so much!! <3<3

  34. Melody Appuglies

    Wow this is so amazing!!! I actually have been thinking a lot about that lately as summer approaches. And sometimes its really hard. But I always go to that verse in Psalms 139:14, "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." I was reading this and thinking wow I really need to hear this…God you are amazing!!! He gives me just what I need when I need it, and even before I realize I need it!!! Your encouragement means much more than you can imagine! Thanks a bunch!!!

  35. Natalia Culbertson

    THANK YOU SO MUCH BELLA!!! As a 15 year old, I struggle with this sometimes and it really brings me down. Reading this lifted my spirits again and led me to remember that God created me just as he wanted me and not any different. This is who I am and I need to embrace it. Sometimes I will look down at my thighs or look at my stomach and think that they need to be skinnier but that’s not true! I am beautiful just the way I am and this post made me realize that even more. This is why I am glad that they banned super skinny girls from modeling in France. Girls don’t need to look like a model or be underweight to be beautiful! Thank you again, Bella!! Continue being a light in the world!

  36. madalynn bunyak

    starting right now, I’m going to start loving myself. and I will train myself to think positively about myself until I believe it. thank you bella.

  37. Nadia Ziegeler

    Thank you soooo much Bella, this is so true and definitely what I needed to hear!!

  38. Trinity Hatlewick

    Your are beautiful Bella!!!

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